


Wait For It

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Black Panther (2018), Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Canon Divergence - Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Humor, Hurt Steve Rogers, Hurt Tony Stark, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Protective Peter Parker, Protective T'Challa (Marvel), Rejecting Soulmates, Soulmate Breakup, because that's who i am inside, just a lot of fucking pain ok, past Tony & Steve soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:54:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: Tony isn’t sure why he ever thought the whole being soul mated to Steve would have ever worked out for the better. Bucky, Steve dropped the whole fucking world for Bucky but he insulted Tony by sending him a damn flip phone. Was it so much to ask to have an up-to-date burner phone? It was almost like Steve went out of his way to insult Tony even if he knew that probably wasn’t true.Steve isn’t a bad man and Tony knows it, which is why he was so damn confused about this bond thing. Obviously they were never meant to be, Steve belonged with like Bucky or something and Tony… he gets along with near anyone else but Steve.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is named after Wait For It from Hamilton the musical because it reminds me of Tony, even if I'm pretty sure that he would think Non-Stop would apply to him more ('why do you assume you're the smartest in the room' anyone?) 
> 
> Now I'm not sure if this is going to be long or short, we'll see. I just wanted some soul mate breakup and here we are.

Tony curls on the couch with his hands wrapped around his middle cringing in pain. “Tony… I don’t know if this is such a good idea,” Peter says, looking pale and worried.

He sighs and closes his eyes for several long moments before opening them again, “it’s my choice now leave me be,” he says as gently as he can. It wasn’t Peter’s fault for thinking the way he did; it wasn’t anyone’s fault really. But this was the right thing to do, he and Steve just weren’t meant to be and they were never going to work. It wasn’t as if either one of them gave up easily either, but nothing was working. Right off the bat he and Steve disliked each other so much that they didn’t even notice the glow until Bruce pointed it out. Tony just thought Steve was angry enough that he his cheeks were flushed and his skin was bright with it. He was certainly that pissed off, but when Bruce pointed out the glow it seemed obvious.

“I know it’s your choice but you’re in pain,” Peter says. He looks so worried and Tony is flattered that he even cared. They hadn’t known each other all that long and honestly he didn’t much expect him to stick around to clean him up. Usually this would be Pepper’s job but… well even she got sick of his shit eventually and Rhodey was currently trying to work out how to function with his new body. Tony had fully expected to deal with this on his own but then Peter had come around and then he kept coming around even though Tony looked like hell and probably smelled worse.

“It’s just the bond breaking, it’ll be fine,” Tony says. All he had to do was hold out until the bond broke even if it hurt like hell in the meantime. It was better this way.

“Just the bond breaking? Tony that’s really not good,” Peter says.

He can’t help but let out a small laugh at that, “I’ll be fine Peter, once the bond breaks I’ll stop being in pain and whatever and it’ll be okay. Can you get me some water?” he asks. His constant shivering and sweating took a surprising amount of energy from him.

*

Tony isn’t sure why he ever thought the whole being soul mated to Steve would have ever worked out for the better. They both knew right away the bond wasn’t romantic given that Tony had been with Pepper with no intention of leaving her, but at this point Tony wondered if it was more like an enemy bond or something. Technically those existed, Bucky and Sam seemed to have one of those bonds but it was different with them than with Steve and Tony. From what he’s gathered from T’Challa they were essentially just really mean to each other but had a strange amount of investment in the other’s safety and well being.

He and Steve have never really been like that. Sure, Tony cared about whether Steve lived or died, he spent a whole lot of time making sure Ross’s goon squad didn’t mow him down but Steve didn’t much seem fond of reciprocation on that front. After Siberia and Steve just about killing him for almost killing Bucky, which he will freely admit was a stupid plan on his behalf even if he still wanted nothing to do with the man, he wondered if Steve cared about him at all. Bucky, Steve dropped the whole fucking world for Bucky but he insulted Tony by sending him a damn flip phone. Was it so much to ask to have an up-to-date burner phone? Even T’Challa had been lost on how he got that given that Wakanda was actually pretty ahead on the tech front, meaning there were no flip phones to be found. It was almost like Steve went out of his way to insult Tony even if he knew that probably wasn’t true.

Steve isn’t a bad man and Tony knows it, which is why he was so damn confused about this bond thing. Obviously they were never meant to be, Steve belonged with like Bucky or something and Tony… he gets along with near anyone else but Steve. He gets along with _Ross_ better and he hates Ross. The guy is a stuck up government asshole, even if he made a few good points about the Avengers and whatnot. Ross is still an insufferable jackass, good points or no. Hell, he and Steve were so out of sync that when Tony was trying to tell him that Pepper _left_ him Steve thought she was _pregnant_. He wasn’t entirely sure what about his word stumbling and obviously upset body language indicated _pregnancy_ but alright. And it wasn’t Steve’s fault, or his fault; aside from the things they deliberately did to affect each other none of this was anyone’s fault.

They have always been a disaster, right from the first fight that nearly ended in a physical fight. At best they were a mess that sometimes worked out okay and after this whole ‘Civil War’ thing he was out. Enough was enough, they were a horrible pair and he was breaking the damn bond. The problem is that Steve wasn’t very impressed with this for one, and for two breaking a bond required zero contact and a whole lot of pain until the bond finally went away.

When he first made the decision to cut his losses, cut _Steve’s_ losses, Steve was in Wakanda with the rest of the team and he had just gotten the letter and the phone. Yet another thing that proved how god damn _terrible_ they were for each other. When the hell had the Avengers ever been more his than Steve’s? They straight up hated him more than they didn’t- which technically mimicked Tony’s actual family exactly but still. And the entirety of the Civil War… god knows he understood where Steve was coming from, he didn’t trust the government much either but shit, they were _worse_. Plus, and this was key, not only did Tony _actually_ break the Accords by going to help Steve in Siberia because he wanted to get that solved before Ross made some crap attempt and got people killed, but Steve thought that he _wouldn’t_.

The thing he has been known for more than most anything else is his willingness to break the rules, it was a trait that drove Steve nuts actually and for some reason he thought that Tony would be a mindless government lapdog. Uh, no. Of course now the Accords were finished and over with until something new came up and Tony… he was out. Giving up being a hero isn’t something he wanted but in the last few years he hasn’t made a single positive decision as a hero so maybe it was best to give it up.

What he hadn’t expected was one very new hero that was like six years old to latch on to him for hero advice. Peter was doing well on his own long before Tony came along but he seemed intent on sticking around for Tony’s advice. Honestly it was flattering and also kind of nice to have someone around for him, especially since Rhodey was doing his best to recover and Pepper… well she had her own stuff.

The other unexpected thing to happen was the strange chemistry he had with the lovely King of Wakanda. He had noticed Steve’s symptoms before Steve had and strangely enough he had gone to Tony before Steve with it. They had been working together for nearly a month at that point to try and work something out with, well, _everyone_ to get the Avengers off the charges laid against them. It was considerably difficult work and as much as Tony wanted to punch Clint in the head he had kids that missed him. So when T’Challa called he figured it was to talk about their case like it was pretty much any other time. Instead he ended up having an extensive conversation about all the ways he and Steve have failed each other over the years and how he was done with it. They weren’t meant to be and he was finished with pretending that they had some sort of salvageable bond when they were so… explosive together and in all the wrong ways.

T’Challa, much to Tony’s surprise had been rather understanding of the whole situation. Soul mates… they’re a pretty important thing in America and Tony wasn’t sure how Wakandans handled it but T’Challa was open minded about the whole bond breaking thing. Steve? Not so much once he figured out what was going on. Tony didn’t blame him, it literally hurt to be away from him with no intention of going back but he was done with all the heartbreak that came with being Steve’s soul mate. Steve had to be done with it too; he was always on Tony’s ass about something new this week so Tony had no clue why he clung to the clearly failing relationship.

The downside of the whole thing was the media backlash to the whole thing once they found out. When it had come out that he and Steve were soul mates- bond type pending- everyone had flipped out and claimed Steve was too good for Tony. That was a basic truth, Tony got it, but now that he was giving up the bond people were just as pissed off. Too good to be with him, but he couldn’t leave without being the villain either. Typical media bullshit, but it didn’t make Twitter very fun. FRIDAY has started to learn how to filter the hate out though, which was nice. Her unlearning English and deciding that Italian was going to be her new language was less nice but she’s on a learning curve so Tony forgave her for it, mostly because he can speak Italian. Peter was lost as hell until she relearned English though.

*

T’Challa wasn’t entirely sure he wanted anything to do with the Avengers after getting them safely out of his country. He had chosen to house them because he owed it to Bucky to help him after nearly killing him several times when he was innocent. But then he started working with Tony Stark and there was something drawing about the man. T’Challa felt it that first time they saw each other at the airport but he had been too caught up with Bucky to pay much attention, and then again when he followed Tony to Siberia. He sometimes dreamed about the way Tony’s face looked when Steve told him that he knew how Tony’s parents had really died after lying to him. The hurt, the betrayal there, and then the anger. T’Challa never would have guessed that they were anything other than casual friends, so when he discovered that they were _soul mates_ he was shocked.

Steve never mentioned Tony outside some battle stories and casual mentions. There was nothing to indicate that they were even remotely bonded- Steve appeared more bonded to _Bucky_ than Tony. The only reason he even knew the two were soul mates at all was because the American media was currently capitalizing off of the ‘star crossed lovers’ trope despite the fact that the two had never been lovers. Steve had not been impressed when he finally figured out what the pain he was in was caused by, and he hadn’t been impressed that T’Challa had kept the knowledge that Tony was ending the bond to himself.

But T’Challa knew what it was like to have a no good bond that needed to go, even if it caused pain. His own soul mate, B’Tumba, had been his best friend since childhood and they had done everything together. It did not last though because B’Tumba grew jealous some time in his late teens and by their early twenties they had a falling out and then… and then B’Tumba died in a rather nasty accident. T’Challa had felt the whole thing, and unlike his friend he did not get the option of death to end it. For weeks he had phantom pains, even phantom memories of B’Tumba’s that revealed just how long he had resented T’Challa for being naturally talented. It was extremely painful but it was an awful bond that trapped them together when they would have been better off apart.

He admired Tony’s courage to end his bond with Steve knowing that it was no good because he would not have had that courage himself. In Wakanda soul mates were extremely important- opting out of a bond was not an option no matter how bad the bond got. It was assumed that you were paired with your soul mate for a reason and that you would find the reason eventually but T’Challa did not agree. Sometimes even the strongest of bonds did little more than bring you pain and suffering and there is no bond on earth that is more important than a person’s wellbeing and health.

So he had kept Tony’s decision to break his bond with Steve to himself because he understood, and because Steve would feel it eventually. When Steve came to him with strong words and accusations T’Challa simply asked if he planned on forcing Tony into the bond. That brought the good Captain up short and T’Challa told him that if he had no desire to violate Tony’s bodily autonomy in that way then he did not need to be so upset with him- he obviously knew about Tony’s decision now. There was no way T’Challa could have hid _that_. He would have assumed with such an obviously weak bond the pain would be short-lived and relatively weak but that has proven to be false. Poor Tony was in a constant mess of shivering and pain and Steve appeared to be suffering some nasty side effects too.

His main concern, though, is Tony. In the process of freeing the Avengers and soul mate talk they started something of a tentative relationship that T’Challa would like to explore some. Tony seemed happy to explore that option too, at least when he did not feel like he was dying.

“Peter is such a sweetie. He brought me Chinese earlier,” Tony says, grinning at him from across the couch. He looks pale and small but T’Challa has seen Tony’s strength and his weaknesses too- he will be fine even if he did not look it right now.

“Actual Chinese or that bastardized American version?” he asks.

“Oh come on, bad Chinese food is _awesome_ T’Challa. Leave the poor kid alone, he’s like seven,” Tony says. The smile on his face indicates his genuine happiness with Peter’s actions. T’Challa found his budding relationship with Peter interesting and rather pleasing to watch because the two clearly cared deeply for each other even though both of them pretended they didn’t.

“I maintain that if Peter really cared about you he would have gotten you real Chinese food,” he says.

Tony rolls his eyes at him, “Chinese elitist. You have to get used to American food, the fact that it’s bad makes it good, T’Challa, that’s how it works.”

T’Challa wrinkles his nose, “in Wakanda we do not think food that is bad is good _because_ it is bad. It is just bad.” Americans, they were extremely confusing at times. Tony laughs softly and carefully shifts himself across the couch, pressing himself into T’Challa’s side. He happily wraps an arm around Tony, enjoying the solid feeling of him there until he starts to shiver. “Are you alright?” he asks.

“Fine,” Tony murmurs, “this just happens sometimes. Can you grab me that blanket?” he asks, gesturing to the blanket that was folded on the floor on the other side of T’Challa. He hands the blanket to Tony, who wraps himself in it carefully before leaning back into T’Challa’s side. “Sorry,” he says softly, pressing his head to T’Challa’s shoulder.

“It is fine, Tony. You cannot help it.” Tony lets out a sigh of relief at T’Challa’s words and closes his eyes, relaxing further into his side. He holds tony carefully and gently and hopes that the bond he had with Steve will break soon.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh _lord_ sorry this took so long! I have been extremely busy with the holiday season and a friend of mine who hasn't been home in a year returned so I've been spending time with her too. But I got this done so yay! I hope you enjoy :)

Tony knows immediately when Steve shows up because he can feel the difference in his body. That and he’s almost to the door when he realizes what he’s doing and pauses to look at the doorknob. If he opened the door he was about to make this process a whole new world of hell on himself and Steve and that wasn’t the point here. The point of this entire thing was to drop a shit bond that wasn’t doing anyone any good, least of all the rest of the world. But when Steve knocks again his body reacts before the rest of him does and the flood of relief, happiness, and relaxed muscles throws him for a moment due to the pain he’s been in the last few weeks.

“God, you look like hell Tony. Are you alright?” Steve asks and he reaches forward to do something that Tony is never going to know about because he steps away. Touch would make this _way_ worse and neither of them needed that.

“I’m fine. I’ll be a whole lot more fine if you leave,” he says through gritted teeth. His body is telling him to move forward, to close the gap between himself and Steve but he ignores it.

“Tony-” Steve starts but Tony holds up a hand, cutting him off.

“No, stop. I don’t want this bond anymore because it isn’t working and it never will so please leave,” he says. Before he falls into Steve’s arms and the fucking bond starts reforming all over again. Usually when a bond forms the two people became inseparable for a time until the bond settled, making it biologically more official. People reported all kinds of things that went along with the bonds up to and including psychic connections. That’s never been proven, but sharing memories, sensations, tastes, likes, dislikes- all of that stuff was normal for a newly bonded pair. The most Tony got from Steve was a month long craving for poached eggs made by some restaurant that closed before Steve even went into the ice. To his knowledge Steve didn’t feel anything from him.

Outside of that he never felt Steve’s pain, he knew for sure Steve didn’t feel his pain, they never shared any sort of thought process ever, they didn’t like the same foods, they didn’t even like the same _clothing_. Hell, they probably couldn’t agree on a wall color. In short their bond was nothing and when Tony decided to break it he figured it wouldn’t involve more than mild discomfort because they basically hated each other. There were only fleeting moments when they didn’t.

“You just haven’t given it enough time,” Steve says, pulling him from his thoughts.

“ _I_ haven’t given it enough time? Look- you know what, it doesn’t matter. We’ve both tried and we both failed at doing much more that pissing one another off to the point where the entire god damn world suffers. We’ve never been good together. Accept it because I have and time is not going to fix all the ways in which we are wrong for each other.” There wasn’t anything that could fix that, not even duct tape and he’s been reliably informed that that fixes everything.

“That isn’t true Tony, we work well when we talk to each other. The universe put us together for a reason so _please_ , stop doing this,” Steve says, pleads really. He looks almost desperate as he leans forward some- he isn’t quite in Tony’s space but Tony takes a small step back anyways.

“We never talk Steve, we don’t trust each other. At all. What little trust I did have in you is completely gone and we can’t build a bond on that. There shouldn’t even _be_ a bond,” he reasons. There was _nothing_ to indicate that they were even remotely good for each other. For everyone else too given how much they resented each other.

“I said that I was sorry-”

“I don’t care about your apologies. The fact that I don’t clearly shows that we aren’t meant to be. You obviously don’t trust me much either given how much you hate me for keeping secrets even when you’re keeping your own. And I get it, I don’t work well with the team but here’s the thing. You don’t even care to ask why, I’m a genius, it isn’t as if I’m not smart enough to clearly see that I’m obviously not good at decision making. But none of you care to listen to me, mostly you and that’s why I’m ending this. You don’t care, I stopped caring, and we both need to move on. I _have_ moved on,” he adds, thinking of T’Challa.

Steve looks unexpectedly hurt and for some reason Tony notices those green flecks in his eyes that Zemo was on about in that stupid bunker. In all honesty he had no idea what Zemo was talking about labeling those little green flecks flaws because Tony found them beautiful. Zemo should stick to being a villain because he’s better at that than pointing out flaws. “You… you _what_?” Steve breaths out, his eyebrows drawing together as his face scrunches with pain. “Do you not feel our bond breaking?”

“Oh I feel it fine, trust me. But I’m done with this bond so I’m ending it and I found someone else that I’d like to… I don’t know, try something with. I don’t know if it’ll end well or not but it’s better than this,” he says, gesturing between the two of them.

“Pepper?” Steve asks.

“No, not Pepper. I don’t know what she’s up to for the most part. Both of us decided that it was best to only keep in contact regarding business.” That has been pretty shitty but he understood her discomfort and his dealing with the Avengers and their messes, plus his own, meant he was distracted anyways. That had been the reason why she left him anyways and he couldn’t fault her for that. She made some good points about his not knowing when to stop- a criticism Steve had too and it’s a fair one. He always has had a problem with limits, which is ironic now considering his position.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t know,” Steve says, parroting his words from so long ago at that table when Tony tried to reason with him. Maybe in the wrong ways but he _tried_ and Steve… Steve just assumed that Tony wouldn’t listen and by the time that things got to where they are he actually _wasn’t_ willing to listen. Mostly because there wasn’t much to listen to in this situation.

“No you didn’t, because you don’t know anything about me and truth be told I don’t know much about you either. You were the guy my father expected me to be and I hated you for it, ended up your soul mate somehow, and then I got to live up to being everyone’s ultimate disappointment once again when I disappointed you too. Consistently. My fault, it’s fine, I know I have a lot to learn and it isn’t always easy to do it but I’m done with this alright? So please go.”

Steve takes another step forward and Tony can’t bring himself to take a step back- the bonds way of protecting itself he knows. Biology had yet to explain _that_ one considering how unproductive it was socially at times but most soul mate pairs didn’t have to deal with this. “Tony you look awful, this can’t be easy on you,” he says and looks down at Tony’s chest, “or your heart. Natasha said you had some pain and with your heart history…” he reaches out again but Tony gets a flash back to Steve’s shield slamming into his chest. He can almost feel the pain radiating out from the plate, almost feel the cracking along his ribs as they strained under the pressure and how that pain fanned out across his entire abdomen.

“No offense, but you’ve never really cared much about my heart considering you literally broke it not long ago. Get the hell out of my house,” he snarls harshly, finally finding the will to step back and walk away.

*

Tony is fine considering Steve had paid him a visit when T’Challa was out. He has business to attend to though and he could not spend every waking minute with Tony as much as he sometimes wishes he could. Of course Tony would hate that and it would be rather unhealthy to spend so much time with him but it always seemed like he got himself into trouble when no one else was with him. He wishes that he had been there to deal with Steve, who was more than likely motivated by pain to show up rather than actual care. From what T’Challa has seen he did not care much and that was fine. Not every soul bond could work out, but it did irritate him that the Captain confused pain with care and Tony was going to be the one suffering for it.

“Are you sure you are alright?” T’Challa asks. He wants to hover over Tony, to cook for him and bring him a blanket but he knows that the man would not react well. He did not appear to like being coddled even when he needed it. Unless he asked T’Challa stayed out of it.

“I’m fine all things considered. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop of course, obviously the pain if going to start again and I’m not looking forward to it but it is what it is. What about you, are you alright?” Tony asks. He looks genuinely interested too as he turns to give T’Challa his full attention.

He thinks on his answer for a moment before sighing, “I am not sure. I do not feel… awful, but I do not feel much of anything to be honest.” There was worry of course, for Wakanda and for Tony, and apprehension at being a leader and a King, but those were normal to feel with such great pressure. It was the rest that worried him, like his general disinterest in… everything almost. He was good at forcing himself through the motions and getting what he needed done finished, but he would rather curl up in bed all day, preferably with Tony. It was easier with someone who understood his pain in ways that most did not. Shuri understood but she did not have the added pressure of being the King and she had her own unresolved issues to sort out.

“The numbness sucks and when it goes away it’ll be pretty hard to decide whether you wanted it to stay or go. Better than the guilty stage I guess,” Tony mumbles. His own grieving, T’Challa has learned, was not exactly the most linear. Probably because he did not like processing his emotions and he did what he could to avoid them. Drinking, gambling, being a super hero- all of it was to distract himself from his pain and suffering but he would not react well if T’Challa told him that point blank. Too touchy.

“I am not certain I am not in that stage of grief. I used to hate spending time with him because it was always something new about what I needed to learn to be a good leader. Now I wish I had paid more attention because I am certain that I will fail him and all because I was too selfish to listen.” He shakes his head and Tony reaches out, gently gripping his forearm.

“You aren’t failing anyone. Trust me, I know what failing the grieving process looks like and you’re doing an amazing job even though you’re still hurt and working your way through it. You’re father would be proud, hell, from what you’ve told me he was proud before all of this mess. You’re going to be a great leader T’Challa,” Tony says. The words are not fake or forced like so many of Tony’s statements and that makes him happy to know that Tony has so much faith in him.

“Thank you,” he says meaningfully, offering Tony a smile that almost wasn’t forced.

*

Peter leans over so he’s a little closer looking confused, “is it just me,” he whispers, “of is T’Challa kind of glowing a little?”

Rhodey breaths out a sigh of relief because he thought he was going nuts, “I thought I was the only one who noticed that. Do you think…” he trails off, wondering how he wanted to phrase his words.

“Do you think they might be soul mates? I mean maybe, it wouldn’t be the first case of a person having a soul mate when that person already has a soul mate. I just don’t know what the bond breaking and stuff for Tony would mean,” Peter says.

Rhodey didn’t know either but people usually spend a large chunk of time with their new soul mates to build up the bond- when the person already had a bond it either became a three-way bond or the bonds were different. Sometimes the bonds weren’t reciprocated either- like his and Tony’s friendship bond. Rhodey had one, Tony didn’t and that worked out fine for them. Those kinds of bonds were taboo given that it was assumed the person without the bond cared less about the person with the bond. Rhodey knew that was bullshit though because Tony cared about him more than most everyone in his life soul bond or no.

“I don’t know, but I am pretty damn sure that T’Challa has found his soul mate and with all that’s going on he hasn’t noticed. And god knows Tony wouldn’t notice even without this Steve mess.” Rhodey wished he were here to kick Steve out earlier. He understood why he’d show up but Tony didn’t want the bond, Steve didn’t get to show up to try and convince him otherwise. But Tony could take care of himself, even if he sometimes liked to do it in some pretty weird ways.

“Do you think it goes both ways?” Peter asks, his voice even quieter than it was before.

“It doesn’t matter. Tony will care about T’Challa all the same. A reciprocated bond wouldn’t make that any less important,” he says in an attempt to teach the kid a lesson or two in soul bonds. He looks confused though so Rhodey figures he failed at his attempt.


	3. Chapter 3

Tony eats the soup that T’Challa made for him and does his best to ignore his pain. He’s only had a lifetime of experience with pretending like he wasn’t hurt in a multitude of different ways so he thinks he does a good job. “What are soul mates like in Wakanda?” he asks. He doesn’t usually ask much about T’Challa’s country because he knew that Wakanda was still pretty secretive and apparently only half on board with rejoining the rest of the world. T’Challa was the one catching flack from his father’s decision. That was likely due to the political change in the country with T’Challa’s coronation- it was an easy time to make a fuss.

T’Challa sits down on the bed beside him gently, careful to not jostle him too much. “In Wakanda your soul mate, or soul mates if you have more than one, are supposed to be the most important person to you. In my culture people believe that Bast hand picks your soul mate to compliment you and to help you through the trials of life.” He stops there and Tony frowns, head tilted to the side.

“You don’t sound like you believe that,” he says. Or at least that’s what Tony thought given the somewhat abrupt end to the explanation.

For a long moment T’Challa considers his words, “I… it is not that I do not believe that. I do, I just… I do not know why Bast would have given me the soul mate that she did. Nor do I understand why you would have ended up with your own soul mate. I have faith in my gods, but I do not have faith that my suffering has taught me anything. There was nothing to learn from the pain that I endured, or the pain that I can see you are in. It is just hurt and I do not understand why anyone should have to feel that.” T’Challa frowns a little, lips turning down as his eyebrows draw together and Tony can relate.

“Never was a believer myself. People used to tell me when I was young that if I prayed god would answer but I never got the solution I was looking for. Then people told me that god worked in mysterious ways like that made my father’s abuse and alcoholism okay because I was supposed to learn something from it, or just endure it like it didn’t affect me. I decided that if that’s what god was then I didn’t need a higher power.” If god meant for children to ever be hurt and abused than that was no god at all, not to him. If his childhood was the will of some higher power than that higher power was more akin to what people thought the devil was than any god Tony would accept. No child deserved the kind of home life he had, even if they have all that money and intelligence to get out of that kind of life. Sometimes it was worse knowing not everyone had that.

“I would have thought you’re atheism was due to you being a man of science,” T’Challa says, head tilted to the side.

Tony snorts, “someone has been watching too many of my interviews. No, that’s just what I tell the public because no one ever wanted to hear about how much I’ve suffered at the hands of my father no matter how explicitly I told them. So I started playing into popular ideas, things my father has said, and things that people expected me to believe. Like science and religion being polar opposites. The history of science is actually very tied into religion though so that makes no sense to me. My atheism is a lot more personal than I’ve led people to believe.” Because people didn’t listen to him when he suffered. He knows he’s lived a pretty charmed life by all means, he’s seen Rhodey and Pepper both struggle in ways he’s never had to, but he’s struggled in ways they haven’t too. All that money and power he has and he still can’t buy what he truly needed and no matter how much he gives it never seems to be enough, even when he gives his life like he had in New York. A man with everything and nothing as Yinsen once said.

He and T’Challa remain quiet for a long time before Tony speaks again. “You have a soul mate?” he asks, curious. T’Challa never mentioned one and if Wakanda is as soul mate crazy as America that seemed pertinent.

“I did, when I was younger. He is dead now and it was not a healthy bond- much like your bond and Steve’s though you are far less resentful than B’Tumba was. But he felt that he could never live up to my natural talent, that I truly was his better half and he grew to hate me because of it. At least with you and Steve both of you have failed each other, for the most part all I did to B’Tumba was exist.” Tony winces because that’s harsh. No wonder he had doubts about his Bast, Tony would too if he hadn’t done much wrong to irk his soul mate.

“Ouch. That sucks,” he says for a lack of something better to say.

T’Challa’s lips quirk up some, “that is fine now because I have you. You are the first person I have ever met that understands that your soul mate is not always the perfect person for you, that sometimes your soul mate will fail you more than any other person in the world. Most people think that I exaggerate about B’Tumba but you did not. Thank you for that.”

“Thank you for telling me that I deserve better than my bond with Steve. Most people act like he’s suffering for having me as a soul mate, like he’s doing some sort of charity work by staying with me because I’m just _that_ horrible. I mean it’s partially true but still, it hurts nonetheless.”

T’Challa shakes his head, “no, do not say that. You are a good man, a flawed man, but a good man. Steve Rogers is not perfect, and he is no less flawed than you, he is simply flawed differently. People overlook that because they are happy to believe he is the symbol of a past they view as better than their present. What they fail to recognize was that Steve Rogers was very progressive for his time period- he was more a symbol of America’s future than it’s past. Sometimes I think that is why you two were soul mates to begin with- because both of you are accurate representations of your country in different ways.”

It wasn’t wrong- Tony has heard the stories about Steve in his prime, how much he actually stood for the rights of people no one cared about in his time. It has occurred to him more than once that they were both futurists in their own ways, but they both had very different ideas of what the future looked like. Shit, they both had vastly different ideas of what the _present_ looked like.

“Well I guess America is doomed to fail as a country because Steve and I suck together. Did you know that when we met we didn’t even _realize_ we were soul mates we were so mad at each other? We almost got into a fist fight for fucks sakes.” He remembered Steve being so close to him and how much he wanted to punch him crystal clear in his mind- most people remembered their soul mates pretty clearly. Rhodey, back in college when they first met, had described the feeling to him once. The second he saw Tony struggling to reach some book in the library he knew and walked over, grabbing the book off the shelf and handing it to him. Rhodey has sympathized with him being a young genius in MIT too because he had only been fifteen himself at the time. But he remembered asking Rhodey once what it was like and he said it was sort of like coming home to a house you’ve never lived in before but you knew it was right for you.

In all honesty after all the bullshit Tony put him through after that he wasn’t sure if Rhodey still felt that way but they’ve been together a long time and it worked for them. Steve though? There wasn’t a time where they worked for more than a few minutes at a time.

“Steve told me that you managed to save a helicarrier of people after that,” T’Challa says, “did that not smooth things over for you?”

“Not for long. Nothing between us has ever stayed smoothed over for long and this Civil War thing, as the media has labeled it; this just pushed it over the edge. In such a short amount of time Steve and I proved that we not only knew jack shit about each other but we just about took the whole damn world down in our squabble. It made no sense to keep a bond that was toxic to us and deadly to everyone around us.” Steve seemed to disagree, he was still sending frequent texts and calls but FRIDAY blocked them long ago on her own. She was doing well learning what he needed and when and she was on a faster learning curve than JARVIS but that was partially because he knew what he was doing this time around. She still had bugs of course, but she was doing well thus far in her trial run. She was finally learning the proper placement for sass too.

“I suppose that is true. I remember the first time we met- sort of- at the airport with Steve and the others. I remember the look on your face as you pleaded with him to stop and his refusal. It is so strange, it is so clear in my mind. If I did not know you had a bond now I never would have guessed and if I had I would have assumed the bond was one way on your end. Was that common, for you to try while Steve simply ignored you?” T’Challa asks.

Tony shakes his head, “no. I’ve done my fair share of ignoring too but this time I tried really hard it fell flat on its face. We’re obviously not meant to be and this just confirmed what I have been ignoring for years honestly.” If only Steve hadn’t been in such denial the entire time too- then they could have ended this long before the bond was strong enough to make them both sick. God even knew how it was this strong when there was no real evidence for it. Even with Sam and Bucky, who were pretty much in an enemy bond, still cared for one another. Barely, but the last time Sam was out on duty and someone tried to hurt him Bucky drop kicked the guy off a building. The last time he and Steve had meaningful contact they drop kicked each other.

*

Rhodey sits next to Tony breathing hard after attempting once again to walk again. “Are you alright?” Tony asks, leaning forward in concern. Rhodey gives him a look because they’ve been over this a million and one times. He wasn’t any different than he was before and he wasn’t going to stand for being treated differently either.

“It’s a question, Rhodey. It won’t bite,” Tony says.

“It isn’t just a question and you damn well know it. You wouldn’t be asking this question if my legs still worked,” he says and they both damn well knew it was true. Tony never asked if he was okay, usually Rhodey either told him straight out that he wasn’t okay or Tony just knew. There was none of this crap when his legs were still working and there would be none of it now.

Tony frowns, “yeah, obviously I’m asking you if you’re okay because your legs aren’t working. I’m not asking to be an ass, I’m asking because you just suffered a severe spinal injury and ignoring that because you think I should ignore a serious medical issue seems irresponsible at best. I don’t think that you’re incapable if that’s what you’re thinking, and I know that’s what you’re thinking, I _know_ that you’re capable of doing whatever you need to do. I just need to know that you’re okay while doing it,” Tony says.

Coming from anyone else Rhodey would call bullshit in a heartbeat but this was _Tony_. His best friend, his _soul mate_ , has never been known for lying and that was partially because he sucked at it. But more than that Tony just didn’t see the point in lying- most of the time it was tied to social niceties and he didn’t understand those either. So he calls things how he sees them and Rhodey knows that if anyone were to truly not treat him differently it would be Tony. That didn’t mean he could shake the feeling that Tony believed all the shit everyone else seemed to. He’s pretty used to people assuming things about him on sight but he usually didn’t give off a vibe that implied he was helpless until he added a wheelchair to the mix. Then suddenly people either ignored that he was there in an attempt to not treat him differently, which he found ironic, or they treated him like a goddamn charity case.

The last thing that he wanted was for Tony to be one of those people because he really needed Tony right now even if he’d never say it out loud. Most of the time he didn’t mind talking to Tony about his issues but this… this was something new entirely. All of the sudden he didn’t have the use of his legs, he lost his military career as he knew it, his best friend managed to piss off the entire country that he lived in and like most things Tony did those actions affected Rhodey too, and he had to relearn how to do everything. There was nothing like realizing you took advantage of being able to take a piss without it being an ordeal and how did you ask someone to help you with that? There was only so much he could expect from Tony realistically and even if he didn’t care about boundaries how exactly do you ask someone to help you shower?

Hell, these days flipping over in bed was a whole new experience, or a lack of experience more accurately. But he didn’t know what to do with any of that and he refused to be treated like a child in need of help for every goddamn thing so he didn’t ask. He’d figure it out somehow while he worked on physical therapy.

“I’m fine,” he says finally because he would be, he just needed to figure things out first.

Tony considers him for a long moment before curling his legs to his chest, an action Rhodey was now irrationally jealous of, and lays his head on his knees. “You aren’t fine, I know you aren’t. You’re handling things exceptionally well because, well, you’re you but you can’t possibly be totally okay. Now normally I would be content to completely ignore how your life has changed dramatically because fuck talking about your feelings, that’s for pussies but I’ve spent my entire life running from my problems and it’s never ended well. So I’m not going to let you run- wheel- away from yours,” he says, adding ‘wheel’ in when he realized Rhodey wasn’t exactly capable of running anymore and likely never would be again. Yet another thing that’s changed for him- his entire schedule that usually started with a morning run and a workout. Now he couldn’t do most of the exercises he’d usually do.

“Yeah? And what makes you think I have any problems I need to sort out, hmm? And all things considered I’d say you did pretty well for yourself,” he says. Tony has been through the ringer more than any other rich kid he’s ever met, it was half the reason he didn’t get annoyed with Tony more than he did. Some of his stupid screw-ups were because he genuinely didn’t know how to deal with things. Despite that Tony is wildly successful several times over, even if his personal life was a little lacking. He was still there for Tony though and he always would be.

“Don’t be dense Rhodey, no one goes through what you did without having a few issues later. I don’t know what it’s like to be in a wheel chair but I do know what it’s like to have your body permanently altered in a way that you didn’t ask for. And I know what it’s like to have that have weird and unexpected effects on your life too. The reactor was pretty heavy in my chest, too heavy actually and it restricted my breathing a lot. That meant that being Iron Man was a pain in the ass for one, but there were other problems too. Showering for sure- I needed to figure out how not to fry myself when wet. I couldn’t move the way I used to without causing stress on my heart and lungs, and sex is a real pain when you can’t breathe. So if you have problems I’ll do my best to help,” Tony says earnestly.

Rhodey frowns because he hadn’t considered what the reactor did to Tony’s life, Tony seemed to react just fine but he supposed he was currently doing the same thing Tony did. Keeping all that crap to himself. They remain quiet for a long time after that until Rhodey finally speaks, “do you think I’ll ever walk again- be honest. I don’t want some sugar-coated bullshit that you think will make me feel better. That won’t solve anything.”

“I think you’ll walk again, but it’ll never be the same. First of all you broke your damn spine, that’s going to cause issues, but even if you get back to your previous state of mobility you’ll notice things are different. With the reactor I still move to touch it, defend it from potential attack even though it isn’t there anymore. I still have heart problems and breathing problems, phantom pains, and that isn’t even getting into the psychological shit. It sounds obvious but I didn’t expect the nightmares and not about things I would have expected. Most of them were about the reactor killing me, not the terrorists,” Tony says.

“That actually happened,” Rhodey points out.

Tony shrugs like having nightmares come true were normal for him- or hell maybe it was. Tony once admitted to him that he used to have nightmares about his soul mate rejecting him and here he was sort of living that out. “So it did. The point is I know what it’s like to have things change dramatically on you without you expecting it and I even know what it’s like to come back and want everything in your life to stay the same because fuck being treated differently just because you went through some crappy things. But guess what, things are different and maybe you need to be treated differently now. It isn’t a bad thing and I’d never think less of you for it. So if you need something, ask.”

He shuffles closer to Tony the best he can and lays his head on Tony’s shoulder, grateful that at least someone was there and that maybe, _maybe_ , he got it more than Rhodey thought he wouldn’t. Tony wraps his arm around his shoulder and squeezes a little and Rhodey is grateful for the comfort.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so somehow religion and science became relevant in this story but alright, that wasn't meant to happen. But hey, writing likes to surprise you with weird shit sometimes. And hey, worldbuilding also happened so I'm doing something right!

“What the _hell_ was going on with you earlier Peter? It was like you couldn’t see or something,” Tony says. He had watched as Peter got his ass handed to him earlier on T.V and as much as he would have loved to do something about it when he tried to move he almost passed out. T’Challa had banished him to the couch at that point and Tony was too busy trying to remain conscious to argue with him.

Peter bites his lip and looks down, “I kind of couldn’t. I broke the goggles you made by accident and I tried to fix them but I think I maybe made them worse and I couldn’t tell you because-” Tony cuts him off.

“The hell you couldn’t tell me, you could have died Peter! What the hell were you thinking?” he asks, trying to get up but the pain radiating from his heart was keeping him on the couch. _Ugh_. “What broke? Bring them to me so I can fix them _immediately_ ,” he says when he seems to be unsuccessful in his endeavors to get the hell up.

“No! You need to like… rest or something. You look like shit, no offense,” Peter says, flinching a little.

“Actually he has been going a little stir crazy on the couch and given the state of American television I do not blame him. It is all so predictable,” T’Challa mumbles, shaking his head. He was particularly annoyed with the state of American horror, which he claimed was either meant to shock the viewer or it was bizarrely religion centered. Tony couldn’t really deny that, the entire Saw series was designed to wig people out in increasingly more disgusting ways. Not that he liked horror, which was problem two with the genre, the only time Tony has been able to move very far was when he all but leapt straight off the couch in terror.

It was safe to say that T’Challa’s favorite genre was not Tony’s. But T’Challa didn’t seem to care for cheesy eighties action movies either- he outright rolled his eyes when Sylvester Stallone jumped out of a helicopter yelling ‘freedom’ in Demolition Man. Tony wasn’t sure how he was going to take the Captain America movies but after that fiasco he was totally going to make T’Challa watch them. There were _so many_ times when ‘Steve Rogers’ yelled ‘freedom’ needlessly. Tony was not about to miss an opportunity to see T’Challa’s face as he watched _that_ on screen. Then he was going to live Tweet the whole thing so everyone else could laugh too. And because Rhodey was special he just might get blessed with videos.

“Yeah, please give me something to do. I’m dying here,” Tony says. Maybe literally given that breaking soul bonds could actually result in death, but he didn’t like to think about that.

“But… that looks a little… literal,” Peter says, wincing when T’Challa gives him a sharp look.

“Whatever, I’m bored and it’s small work. T’Challa can bring me my tools if you’d be so kind?” Tony says, smiling at T’Challa.

“If it keeps your from complaining about everything then I will happily provide you with entertainment. And so long as I do not have to watch any movie you think is decent,” he says.

“Oh, can we watch my pick!” Peter asks excitedly.

“You cannot do worse than Tony,” T’Challa says and Tony resents that, really. He _loved_ his classics, music too. Which T’Challa also hated because he lacked taste.

In the end T’Challa disliked the Hunger Games as much as Tony’s pick, but now Tony was suffering Jennifer Lawrence yelling about bread on screen too. Peter, at least, was happy with his own choice and Tony had to wonder what kind of shit kids these days were into.

*

Steve brushes Tony’s hair back and Tony blinks a few times, frowning because Steve shouldn’t be here. “Hey,” Steve says softly, “remember when you said that we never really shared anything? Well, we’re sharing a dream so I guess you were wrong.”

It isn’t meant to be rude, Tony knows, but he can’t help but bristle at the comment. “Hey, hey, shh, I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that you don’t think we have a bond worth saving and I do and now I’m proving it,” Steve says.

Tony sits up in his bed, sign number two that this was definitely a dream because in real life he couldn’t move much and unless T’Challa moved him he was on the couch. They were where Steve imagined they would be; there were accounts of this.

“Steve, the only think you’re proving is that you’re desperate enough to save the bond that it’s finally letting you contact me in my dreams. Scientifically-“ Steve cuts him off.

“This isn’t science, Tony, this is love,” Steve tells him forcefully.

“Love is science, in case you didn’t know it’s just a bunch of chemicals in the brain. Sounds scientific to me. All emotions are like that and soul bonds are no different, Steve, that’s just how it works,” he explains almost gently even though he was frustrated. But in Steve’s time none of this stuff was known, in his time people were still arguing about whether or not soul bonds even existed. There were heavy accounts of them all over the world, through all cultures, through every time period there was and even some anthropological evidence of soul bonds from pre-history but that wasn’t enough post-enlightenment. That’s when measurable data was heavily preferred- something Tony both loved and hated. He loved empirical data for obvious reasons, but he hated it because it was so damn limiting.

There were too many times people have told him that his ideas were worthless because they were impossible according to science. That didn’t stop him from defying physics and all known data because yeah, that data exists, but any scientist worth their salt knew that data was always subject to change with new discoveries. So keeping an open mind was necessary, otherwise progress would never happen. Hell, scientists in the eighteen hundreds would have assumed Tony’s suit was _witchcraft_ for fucks sakes, clearly they made some advancements since then by knowing that data wasn’t necessarily as fixed as people liked to assume it was.

“What is it with you and science, this isn’t the kind of thing you measure and test Tony. Is just is, soul mates are… they’re magic,” Steve says. Tony can see him trying to get his point across, pleading with Tony through his facial expressions but Tony wasn’t having it.

“You don’t get it Steve, you talk about magic like it’s… separate from science. Don’t you understand, science _is_ magic. Imagine me going back in time and showing people the things I can do now, they’d think it was all an illusion, that it was an elaborate magic trick but it isn’t. Its just science that they would have never been exposed to. Some famous dude said that magic is just science we don’t understand yet and how true is that- look at Thor. He has so much stuff that we’ve never seen or heard of and none of it is magic, we just haven’t figured out the explanation yet,” Tony says. He can feel his excitement level rising because this was one of his favorite topics, science was just who he _was_ but other scientists didn’t get it.

They talked empirical evidence and objectivity like it was separate and different from feeling and humanity but it wasn’t. How many scientific discoveries would have never happened if that scientist had never had a feeling? Tony has revolutionized the world time and time again on nothing but a hunch and yeah, obviously you needed evidence to back it all up, that was a given. But to start? All you needed was some hope and all the knowledge that came before you, then you could cut out a piece of knowledge that you discovered yourself. Jane Foster’s entire work was based on feeling too and she discovered _way_ more about the universe in a single conversation with a literal alien than most people have in a lifetime of research. And even better, it backed up everything that she had been saying before when no one believed her. Science and feeling weren’t separate and the data would happily prove that. Humans might have feelings but hard data and numbers, that didn’t lie. But sometimes you needed a feeling to get there.

“That’s not how it works Tony, some things just don’t need an explanation,” Steve says, frowning at him.

Just like that a damper was thrown on his good mood because as usual Steve missed the point. “Yeah Steve, things _do_ need an explanation, if we know how things work we gain so much from it, we can learn! We can do better, build better, expand! How do you not get it, explanations are the reason for so many positive changes in the world, imagine if people still believed the bullshit pseudoscience that circulated in the nineteenth and twentieth century! Science and progress is necessary to for us all to grow out of our past into a better future. Soul mates are part of that; in your time people actually thought soul mates didn’t exist. Science proved they did, even if the science of _how_ soul mates exist is a little shaky,” he says.

There was some evidence that other animals had soul bonds too- cows in particular showed evidence for favoring certain cows over others and experienced duress when separated from their favorite cow, but the science of soul bonds with animals was still in progress. But the fact that it was happening, that people were no longer denying that soul mates _did_ exist was where they needed to be, the how would come later. And hell, maybe cows really did have soul mates, and maybe other animals too. It wasn’t as if humans were the only special species on the planet though people didn’t much like the idea that wasps had soul mates. To be honest neither did Tony, those little fuckers didn’t even have _souls_ let alone mates.

Steve rolls his eyes, “would you just stop, science doesn’t matter Tony, not with this. It’s done some good things for the world but we don’t need to poke around at soul bonds, why would we even do that?” Steve asks, curling his lip like that was… disgusting or something.

“So we know what’s going on Steve, in the fifties people assumed all bonds were healthy, heterosexual, and romantic. We know now that that isn’t true, the nineties saw _huge_ improvements in how bond types were categorized and developed and do you even _know_ the kind of impact that had on same-sex couples? They were no longer labeled deviants, Steve; we would have been an _illegal_ pairing in your time because people didn’t poke at soul bonds. Rhodey’s bond with me would have been illegal too actually, desegregation didn’t happen until ’67 and platonic bonds weren’t officially a category of bonds until ’97. Shit were Rhodey and I confused for _years_ before someone came along and thought to assume that maybe bonds weren’t all romantic. And the notion that bonds can go one way, that was _huge_ in the eighties. Don’t you get how important that knowledge is?” he asks.

Surely Steve couldn’t be _that_ obtuse, his own supposed soul mate would have been illegal in his time. “Imagine if Bucky and Sam had met in the forties Steve, they would have been killed! Poking at things is the reason they can be together- we know now that the reasons they would have been crucified were ridiculous, that previous bond assumptions are nothing more than bigoted crap and the data proves it. Science did that, and curiosity. I know that you think bonds are sacred and all that but what I don’t think you’re getting is that science is too, at least to me,” he says.

Steve opens his mouth to reply, his face softening some but Tony doesn’t get to hear his response because he wakes up, or more accurately he’s woken up. He blinks a few times to readjust to the light around him, finding T’Challa crouching beside him looking worried. “You deemed distressed about Steve,” he explains.

Right, sleep talking. It wasn’t something he did often according to Pepper but it happened. It freaked her out when it happened but T’Challa only looked worried about him. “What do you think about science?” he asks.

T’Challa frowns, “science… in Wakanda science is different than what you are used to. But I have always been a man of science and discovery; I enjoy building things and figuring them out. I like learning and expanding and science does not always do that, but it does provide a good platform for that kind of evolution of knowledge to happen.”

Tony smiles, “so you get it, you know that science is the way forward, even if it takes us all a step back for a moment in time. Failure is necessary to learn too; I mean look at all the crazy shit people believed about skulls and head shape way back when. But we learned that that was bullshit and moved forward, even if we aren’t where we need to be yet,” he says. But they were _trying_ and science was allowing them to do that, allowing them to combat problems bot social and technical with facts that challenged what they knew, that expanded their knowledge base. How did Steve not understand that?

“Yes, science is a good way to learn, to move forward. I do not think that it is the _only_ way to do that but you are not a man of religion,” T’Challa says, smiling at him.

He lets out a soft laugh, “no, I’m not. No real evidence for a god, or gods,” he adds, remembering that T’Challa’s culture had a polytheistic religion.

“‘Sometimes a leap of faith is the difference between a theory and a discovery’,” T’Challa says, grinning.

“Did you just quote something I said in my early twenties?” he asks, laughing when T’Challa nods. “Bring me definitive proof that your gods exist and I will happily believe in them,” he says.

T’Challa runs his fingers over Tony’s arm, “I do not care if you believe in my gods, my own faith is enough for me. But your faith in science, that might as well be a religion on its own. You are a strong believer,” T’Challa notes.

“Maybe. I like to think that science is a bit more fact based but hey, for all I know I’m not looking for facts in the right places. Looking for things in areas you wouldn’t expect only to discover a whole new thing has happened to me more times than I can count, but I’ll still stick with the science side of things regardless of its similarities to religion to you.” He disagreed but that was fine, he didn’t expect to agree with T’Challa on everything. That was impossible and after the last few years he’s learned to agree to disagree without making a big deal out of it.

T’Challa smiles, “well, at least you did not try to tell me that I am stupid and primitive for my beliefs,” he says, shaking his head like he thought whatever twit told him that was the stupid primitive one.

“Ew,” Tony says, wrinkling his nose because one, that’s just rude, and two, religion didn’t make a good intelligence guide. Hell, his father was an atheist and he might have been brilliant scientifically but he was horrible in basically every other area.

“Agreed. The kicker is that the man was religious, which means that he was also stupid and primitive,” T’Challa says.

‘Oh, but _his_ religion is the _right_ one. Another reason I’ve never liked religion, too many of them,” he says.

“As opposed to _how_ many scientific theories?” T’Challa asks, eyebrow rising.

“Okay so you win that one, but just that one,” Tony says, feigning resentment. T’Challa laughs at him and he laughs back as best as he could in his current state. It was nice though, the pleasant conversation with T’Challa that was so unlike his relationship with Pepper or Steve. Both of them had expected a degree of compliance and agreement with their plans and beliefs but T’Challa, he was happy to just talk about things without it being a problem that they didn’t agree. He learned things that way, like random tidbits of T’Challa’s culture and things about his gods even if Tony didn’t believe in them. The information was still relevant and useful if only because it mattered to T’Challa.

“So what brought on the question of science, if you do not mind me asking,” T’Challa murmurs some time later.

“Steve. Turns out he can appear in my dreams now, ugh. Anyways we’ve sort of always disagreed on science and it’s sort of a sticking point for me. He just doesn’t understand how I see science, what it means to me,” he says, frowning some remembering his dream conversation with Steve. He really wished science could tell him how to stop that from happening because he didn’t need any more crap from Steve.

“Then you are not having a disagreement over science, you are having a disagreement over the fundamentals of your beliefs and it appears that you cannot reconcile your differing opinions. What science means to you does not require an understanding of said science, it requires understanding _you_. You do not believe in my gods, for example, but you know they are important to me regardless and you allow space for my beliefs. I take it that does not happen with Steve?” T’Challa asks even though he knows the answer.

“I don’t really think either one of us make room for each other. Once again we’ve proven that we suck together,” he mumbles.

“The bond will break Tony, it will just take time,” T’Challa tells him in a soft, comforting tone. Or at least it’s meant to be comforting but Tony had his doubts. He swore the damn bond was getting _stronger_ , not weaker.


	5. Chapter 5

Because Peter had been worried about Tony’s health and avoided telling him that his damn goggles broke Tony decides to teach Peter how to fix them himself. It was a useful skill anyways, and god knows he might not always be around to fix them for Peter. Aside from the very real possibility of death in regards to this whole bond breaking thing there was also the fact that he travelled a lot and in regards to heroing he also got injured enough to put him out of commission. Hell, his ribs were still sore from where Steve smashed his shield into them. He was tempted to give the shield back to T’Challa- despite being the governments property technically the metal had been stolen from Wakanda. It rightfully belonged to the king. He doesn’t do that though because it would be petty and immature and he was sure T’Challa would agree.

Peter, though, is at least excited to learn about his own suit. Which was also a necessary thing- knowing how things worked gave you mastery over them and in his situation mastery over himself was the difference between life and death. Tony didn’t think his unusually attractive aunt would be very impressed to find out her fetus nephew was a superhero and surprise, he’s dead now! Even Tony wouldn’t be impressed with that so he teaches Peter what’s going on in an attempt to make sure he didn’t do something stupid and dangerous like fighting some random villain with no fucking sight. It wasn’t like he was that one guy in Hells Kitchen who was rumored to be blind- and obviously he could handle himself- Peter was used to having eyes and going without them made him almost more dangerous than the villain he was fighting. Plus doing stupid dangerous things was Tony’s shtick and he wasn’t being taken over by a literal child.

“Hey, I um, changed a couple things about the way the eyes narrow. Sometimes they moved too slow or quick so uh- is that okay?” Peter asks and Tony frowns at him over his notepad. Today he only felt like he was _kind of_ dying so he figured he’d get work done. Pepper had been worried enough about him that she called him earlier, before Peter got here, and asked if he was okay so he figured it might be time to get off his ass.

“Yeah of course that’s fine. This is partially why I wanted to teach you how to handle your suit anyways, you can predict and respond to your needs far faster than I can. So yeah, do what you need to do to make it more efficient for you and please, for the love of god, _stop_ dumpster diving. If you want some random old tech thing, just ask,” he says. The poor kid, he couldn’t imagine him going through some trash to get a freaking DVD player of all things. Didn’t everyone have one of those these days? And god, that computer in his room was just sad to look at. He sent the poor kid a Stark laptop just because he still had nightmares about out dated tech ruining Peter’s life. For some reason the dreams always seemed to end with Peter getting eaten by the computer. He blamed the weird dreams on Steve’s clearly fucked up imagination because that did not come from him and apparently _now_ the bond was starting to kick in like a normal bond.

Yesterday he spent a solid two hours debating on whether or not he wanted to listen to some shitty forties music that he sure as hell wouldn’t have been interested in without Steve’s influence. _Shitty forties music_. Uh, no. “I don’t wanna like _ask_ for things, that’s just rude,” Peter says, wrinkling his nose and drawing Tony’s attention back to him. Right, he was having a conversation like a normal human. He needed to get his shit together and this freaking bond with Steve needed to fuck off.

“Look kid, your dumpster diving makes me sad. Do an old man a favor and just _ask_ for stuff, it’s not rude if I tell you that it’s okay,” he points out.

“It’s weird. And what will I tell aunt May? And the media will probably think you’re like… my sugar daddy or something. Actually aunt May might think that too and that’s just… awkward. I don’t want to have to explain to my aunt that I don’t have a sugar daddy, there are some things a teenager never needs to experience,” Pater says, looking freaked out.

“Tell your surprisingly hot aunt that it’s part of the bursary thing. It’s not like I’m not known for finding some random brilliant student and funding their education and stuff. Congrats on being my new pet student. Boom, solves the media issue too.” _Genius_. Which really shouldn’t surprise him given that he was, in fact, a genius.

“Do you not know about Millennials? We don’t like asking people for things. It’s weird and that’s why we always looked so freaked out in Lush stores. The customer service is too good and we just want to hide behind the bath bombs,” Peter says, mimicking said frightened look. Tony throes back his head and laughs because Peter was ridiculous.

“Just ask for something if you need it, kid, I don’t bite,” he says.

“Neither do Lush employees,” Peter points out and Tony snorts. What a kid.

*

T’Challa looks tired and Tony sympathizes, “are you alright?” he asks. He wishes that he was there but sadly he wasn’t much able to travel to Wakanda in his condition and T’Challa had a country to run. It would have been nice to be around T’Challa, Tony felt better when he was there, but realistically that wasn’t happening.

“I… I am not sure how I feel,” T’Challa says, rubbing his temples.

“Well you look exhausted,” Tony says. He sort of looked like Tony did on a good day- pale, bags under his eyes, and a clear tiredness in his posture.

Tony gets a half a smile for his efforts, “thank you for that, dear. This whole mess of involving Wakanda into world politics has been taxing and my people have not been easy on me. They likely would have been had I retracted my father’s decision to move us outwards but the decision was important to him, and to me. That does not mean that Wakanda as a whole has been impressed with this,” he says. He shakes his head and rubs his temples again, obviously stressed with the political mess around him.

Tony could relate- getting the Avengers off their charges hadn’t been easy and while T’Challa had been more than cooperative he had had to pretend like he was not currently harboring a team of superpowered individuals. And Tony had had to play that game too, and then there was all that mess afterwards and he mostly didn’t have to deal with the UN after he got the Avengers off their charges. Not that the rest of the world was impressed with that given that he _had_ been quoted saying that there _would_ be consequences. And there should be, but there were bigger fish to fry. Even after all of that Tony only sill half knew what T’Challa was dealing with- it wasn’t like he was the president or anything. Thank _god_. “Some of Wakanda has to agree with you though, right?” Tony asks, unsure of how the country did much of anything. Other than tech- they had some _awesome_ tech.

“Some, but the loud minority is… well, loud and insistent. There have been an unusual number of political hate groups on the rise looking to return Wakanda to its ‘glory days’- which should not be regarded as glorious, mind you. I never would have thought I would see the day when that White Ape group was seen as anything but disgusting or even laughable but they are gaining a frightening amount of power,” T’Challa says.

“White Apes? The fuck kind of name is _that_?” he asks. Seemed a bit odd to him to say the least, but so was what little he knew about the Black Panther and T’Challa’s role as both political leader and the Black Panther. The position and associated responsibilities were around long before T’Challa had taken up the mantle but what Wakanda needed warriors- T’Challa’s words- for in this day and age he had no clue. He figured there was some sort of cultural significance he wasn’t getting. Or maybe that was the closest English word; Tony had that issue switching languages sometimes because translation wasn’t really exact.

“There is whole history behind white apes in Wakanda- the animal not the hate group- they were mutated because of the vibranium, that does not matter. The point is that they became associated with divinity due to their mutation and the assumption that if you consumed the flesh of one of these apes you would gain powers-”

“So like the Black Panther then, minus eating the animal,” Tony says,

T’Challa gives him a _look_ for interrupting and Tony shrugs sheepishly, gesturing for T’Challa to continue. “Sort of like the Black Panther, except to gain power you eat the heart shaped herb. Anyways, white apes ended up deified and their cult following… they left something to be desired. They quickly became associated with outdated ideals and Wakanda’s past, not Wakanda’s present. They wished to return the country back to a time when the monarchy was cruel and merciless here and no one should have any desire for _that_ but apparently that is more desirable than being with the rest of the world! And if I hear _one more_ thing about my relationship with you I will scream. Just because I am dating an American does _not_ mean I have any desire to bring American ideals to Wakanda. No offense,” he adds hastily but Tony only laughs. It wasn’t like he minded, thought if Wakanda could share their tech he’d be a happy guy.

“So your uh… White Apes want to… out you even _more_ in charge?” Tony snorts, “that’s the least effective hate group _ever_. And I’m offended that Wakanda doesn’t like me because I am a _delight_ ,” he says very seriously.

T’Challa throws back his head and laughs, “yes, you are a delight but Wakanda has not been fond of the outside world for a long time. It will take them time to come around but they will like you eventually, you are genuinely lovely,” T’Challa says, smiling. “And to be fair to the White Apes they would seek to disempower me first, but that is not happening.”

“Still think that’s a stupid name. And these White Ape people, they _do_ know that you just about took out the most successful assassin in history single handedly _repeatedly_ right? Because I feel like they should know that you’re a total badass and they’re not going to win their fight,” Tony says. It was framed in a flattering way but T’Challa took on Bucky, Sam, and Steve and almost won too. If it wasn’t for the cops showing up he had Bucky and he had successfully outsmarted Sam and Steve up until then. That was no easy task, Tony dealt with Bucky and Steve and he had had a significant amount of trouble, T’Challa had gotten Sam off his ass too. That was more than a little impressive given that T’Challa was one man who outsmarted and beat three men’s asses and two were enhanced. Sam was pretty damn smart too, even if he didn’t have enhancement outside the wings.

“You flatter me,” T’Challa says, ducking his head a little and Tony is _positive_ he sees a little pink in T’Challa’s cheeks. “Even if that was not true they would not win their fight. People may see the merit in their argument now but that is only because they assume my plans, my father’s plans, will not work out for the best. They will and the White Apes will lose power again. And if they do not they are fools to think I am an easy target- the last time I ran into them they regretted it. I have improved in my training considerably since then- they would do best not to underestimate me,” T’Challa says, a dangerous undercurrent to his words.

“It isn’t flattering if it’s true, honey,” Tony point out.

*

Rhodey wasn’t used to helplessness- his entire life he’s strove to be independent, to not rely on anyone but himself. It was important to him, to his mother, that he did that and now he was stuck in a role where accepting help wasn’t an option. Obviously Tony was more than willing to help and had helped on more than one occasion but it felt off. He was used to Tony needing him and he liked that role, helping others meant having yourself together and now he didn’t know what any of that meant and it scared him a little. Tony, aside from the differences in how he moved and thought, treated him basically the same too but Rhodey could feel himself tense up every time he spoke because he expected Tony to treat him like everyone else had.

He wasn’t sure why exactly, Tony never treated him the same as everyone else did. When he met Tony reaching up for that book in the MIT library Tony had glared at him and told him he hadn’t needed any damn help, thanks, and stomped off. Rhodey had been too damn floored by the fact that he was pretty sure he just met his soul mate and he was _rude_ to go do anything about it. But Tony was an easy guy to find and it was like they kept running into each other everywhere after that. Finally after a week of Tony avoiding him every time they inexplicably ran into each other Tony all but threw a coffee at him and sat down across the small table he had stationed himself at to work on his homework. He spent an unnerving amount of time glaring at Rhodey until he rolled his eyes and told Tony that he was pretty sure they were soul mates.

Back then one way bonds were really hush-hush, no one ever talked about them and Tony’s confusion was apparent. When he told Rhodey that he hadn’t felt anything Rhodey shrugged and told him that he had, but it was fine if Tony wanted to walk away. Back then the notion of non-romantic bonds and queer men were pretty unheard of too, unless it was AIDS people were discussing. Of course that hadn’t occurred to Rhodey until _after_ he told Tony that he was his soul mate. Tony didn’t flip out though, or claim that people regularly claimed to be his soul mate- which was true- instead he shrugged and told him his soul mate was defective for liking coffee with sugar in it. Rhodey told Tony he was defective because he was rude as hell and Tony threw back his head and laughed.

In the following years it became apparent to Rhodey as to _why_ Tony was so withdrawn and emotionally distant, and he was happy to have Tony keep his distance to a point. Tony Stark was his soul mate and that would come with a lot of perks Rhodey had no interest in. when he joined the military he intentionally went by the name ‘Jim’ at first because ‘Rhodey’ was the nickname Tony gave him and he didn’t want people to make the connection. He worked his way up on his own and Tony was happy to play like he didn’t know him when they saw each other though Rhodey had always wondered why. He didn’t ask though because he was intent on making a name for himself _outside_ of Tony’s and he was pretty sure Tony understood that, even if he was also pretty sure that Tony was convinced that Rhodey was ashamed or something.

When the military _finally_ caught onto their friendship Tony had been halfway through a weapons deal with Tony and his superior had approached him about it. Rhodey had flat out turned down the position as the military’s liaison with SI because he hadn’t wanted a promotion because he had a connection to Tony. Funnily enough it turned out that everyone already noticed that the only one who seemed to be able to handle Tony’s attitude, arrogance, and mood swings was Rhodey- which was why he got the position. The fact that they were friends had only clued his coworkers into _how_ he could deal with Tony. To be fair he wasn’t that bad if you knew what to avoid with him. He had a lot of problems that he refused to deal with and the result was extreme touchiness in regards to a number of different subjects. Years later Rhodey recognized the symptoms in his men- PTSD.

So he worked his way through the military, made deals with Tony for them, and then SI shut down the weapons sector and effectively killed Rhodey’s job. But he understood why Tony was doing what he was doing even if it negatively affected him. And then that deal with fucking Hammer. That was the last time he ever took advice to talk to that goddamn twit about anything but being a joke, but he at least got to keep his job. Then Tony gave him a _suit_ and oh boy did that change his position in the military. He had an individualized job that _only_ he could do and it was in part because of Tony, but he was the only one qualified to run the suit anyways. First, Tony set it up so that Rhodey’s fingerprints were required to get the suit to actually _function_ , but the suit was also designed entirely around Rhodey’s very specific skill set.

There were a lot of things he never anticipated out of life and becoming a literal superhero was one of them. He never expected for random children to recognize him on the street as _him_ rather than Tony’s friend and it was surprisingly nice. When he was a kid there weren’t may heroes that looked anything like him to look up to and he never expected to be that person to kids like him, but it never failed to make him smile. He never expected that the suit, despite being an obvious link to Tony, would have gave him a considerably large identity outside of the man but that was what he wanted anyways. He loved Tony, always would, but he never wanted to benefit off of him. He was strong, independent, talented, and capable enough all on his own and he never had an interest in the things Tony could do for him. He also had no idea how rare that was for the man, rare enough that when Rhodey told him he could walk away with no apparent motivation behind the words Tony had been intrigued enough to stick around.

But now their positions were completely reversed, Tony was taking care of Rhodey now and he had no clue how to take that. On one hand he knew he needed it- as much as he hated to admit it there were things he was flat out incapable of doing himself, but on the other hand that has never been what his and Tony’s bond has looked like. It’s always been him taking care of Tony, making sure Tony didn’t do something stupid, calling him on his bullshit when he did, and he didn’t want that to be reversed. He liked his bond just the way it was because it was another symbol of his independence- Tony came to _him_ for advice, came to _him_ for help, because _he_ understood and _he_ was put together enough to handle it and now it was all messed up and Tony knew it. Contrary to popular belief Tony was pretty attuned to emotion, he just ignored the ones he found irrelevant.

“Can I tell you something I’ve never told you before?” Tony asks, throwing a chip at him. He bats the chip away, glaring at Tony as he does.

“I know I don’t get a choice, and if you tell me _anything_ about your sex life you are banned from speaking to me for the rest of your life. There are things a man never needs to know about his best friend,” Rhodey says, shaking his head. Usually that was a bonding thing between guys but Tony came out of the woodwork with the most _ridiculous_ stories and they usually ended with Rhodey either cringing or trying to escape the room to save his ears from the rather explicit detail of his best friend’s sex life. And Tony was _great_ with the details, too damn good for his own good a lot of the time.

Tony laughs, “nothing about my sex life, Rhodes. Though to be fair that’s partially because I don’t currently have one, but when I do I’ll let you know,” he says and Rhodey starts waving his hands around.

“If you ever want me to be able to look T’Challa in the eye or even be in the same room as him you will keep that to your damn self,” he says, shuddering. That had been a pairing he never saw coming though he’s long known about his interest in men too. He tended to keep that far more low profile than his interest in women though and given the recent news articles printed about him Rhodey saw why. People were damn cruel. He would think that no one in his right mind, even Tony on a bad day, would date the king of a foreign nation that was well known for disliking outsiders for _attention_ after this Civil War thing but the media had other ideas. Plus Tony was a pretty attention-getting guy, he didn’t need T’Challa for that. At some point he’d like to ask T’Challa what he thought of that, especially with all the news mingling around Tony’s supposed betrayal to the good Captain that Rhodey was tempted to punch, even if he could only reach the man’s dick to punch. _Especially_ because he could only reach Steve’s dick to punch.

“Fine, fine. I’ll consider your nice request. That’s irrelevant though, because what I wanted to tell you was that you’re a fucking asshole,” Tony says and he’s serious too, Rhodey could see it for one, but he could also feel it through the bond.

“I… what?” he asks, frowning in confusion.

“When I came back from Afghanistan, by birthday even though that was a little warranted- a lot warranted actually, but mostly after New York. Seriously man, I was having _panic attacks_ in public, writing ‘help me’ on children’s drawings instead of autographs and you pretty much told me to get over it. Pepper too, and it left me in a tough spot because I damn well knew the Avengers didn’t like me and neither did the only two people I had left and JARVIS was an AI. Poor bastard could only do so much,” Tony says, “I know you probably thought you were helping but you just made it worse. A lot worse, isolation is like the last thing someone with bad mental health should have.”

Rhodey frowns again because _what_? Tony had never told him any of this, obviously given that this was the first hew as hearing about it. “I… you hate being babied, I mean I know most of our relationship is me taking care of you but I got good at hiding that I was doing it. I thought… I figured that maybe being blunt like that might help you. I didn’t think it did the opposite…” There hadn’t been any indication through the bond that anything had changed but then Tony got good at hiding things anyways even if he didn’t have a reciprocating bond. Tony had been so intent on ignoring his parent’s deaths that Rhodey flat out hadn’t felt his pain until he got a call at home from Tony, who sounded completely normal on the phone until he said that his parents were dead and _then_ the bond opened up a world of pain. He would have liked to never feel the loss of a parent again, but sadly both of his were dead too though his ma went long after Tony’s parents and his father died before he was born.

“I know you were trying to help in the only way you knew how, but I know that saying or doing the wrong thing can be detrimental. Our bond might not go two ways but I’m not an idiot, I can see that something’s wrong and I’m not looking to make things worse for you so if… I don’t know, you need to talk or something just say something. I won’t judge,” Tony says and Rhodey knew that already. Tony was pretty good at that too, except with Steve of all people, they were in a constant state of judging each other and that was why they failed as a bonded pair. Rhodey knew full well that that wouldn’t be a thing with him and Tony but… but he didn’t know how he felt about saying something either so he stays quiet for a long time.

“That’s the problem you know,” he says eventually, figuring me might as well just get it out.

“What?” Tony asks, frowning.

“That you’re willing to help, that you _do_ help. I’m used to my independence and I don’t like… I don’t like that you’re taking care of me. I like to take care of me,” he says.

Tony makes a face and his confusion comes through the bond loud and clear, “you are taking care of you Rhodey, I’m just sort of… here taking suggestions,” he says.

“What the hell does that even mean?” he asks, confused.

“It means that maybe you should rethink independence for yourself. You _do_ realize that you direct all the help you’re getting from me and hired caregivers, right? We don’t know what you need, you need to tell us what you need and then we respond to you. You haven’t lost independence; it’s just shifted from what you’re used to. You’re still in control of your life and your freedom; you just have some people assisting you with that now. It’s not really that different from before, it isn’t like you didn’t regularly have a bunch of people in your life helping you anyways. At work on any given day you worked with a bunch of people to get something done. It’s just a different form of that,” Tony says, shrugging like it was no big deal.

Except to Rhodey that was a _huge_ deal and Tony’s words were… well they were true. “I… didn’t think of it that way,” Rhodey admits.

“Yeah, well that’s why you have me around. I _am_ a genius,” Tony says, proudly sticking his chest out.

“Oh calm down, I’m a genius too in case you forgot,” he says. Which people _did_ consistently do much to his annoyance.

Tony deflates some, “fun sucker,” he accuses.

“Truth teller,” Rhodey corrects and Tony sticks his tongue out at him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, excuse my shoddy history. I'm working off fuzzy memories of random things I've learned so don't expect the utmost accuracy here. Or like any.
> 
> This chapter is kind of campy and fun though, with a tad of plot. Moving on to some more Steve related things next chapter though!

Tony was enjoying a nice dream in which he was perched in T’Challa’s lap kissing him when fucking Steve _had_ to show up. “Tony!” he says, clearly having gotten his delicate sensibilities offended.

“Get out of my wet dream Steve, what the fuck?” Tony says, waving at him to go away. Against all odds T’Challa turns too, frowning at Steve’s sudden presence.

“Is it normal for him to show up randomly?” T’Challa asks, surprisingly autonomous given that this was a dream.

“Uh… yeah kind of. Now _go_ because this dream was awesome until you crashed it,” Tony says, slumping in T’Challa’s lap.

“Why are you making out with the king of Wakanda? I don’t think he would appreciate that,” Steve says, hands on his hips like an offended old granny or something.

“Do not speak for me, I would be very happy if this was happening in real life. Do not listen to him,” T’Challa says, waving a hand dismissively at Steve and grinning at Tony.

“Stop making him do that,” Steve complains. He looks uncomfortable but Tony didn’t really care because this was surprisingly funny.

“He is not making me do anything,” T’Challa says, “I am fully capable of- oh. I should not be autonomous unless… unless you are my soul mate but I could I have not noticed!” he asks, looking panicked.

“I mean when we met you _did_ just lose you dad and I was a bit distracted given that wait a minute here, if this is going down like this with like whole conversations and shit that means the bond goes both ways. How the hell did _I_ not notice?” Tony asks, frowning.

“You have a history of that,” T’Challa points out.

“What bond doesn’t go two ways?” Steve asks, eyebrows drawing together.

“Lots of bonds you shit. Like mine and Rhodey’s- I _know_ I’ve told you about that bond which only goes to show that you’re a crappy listener,” Tony says. Not that he was a _better_ listener per se but come on. Maybe he forgot everyone’s birthdays every year but he at least remembered that he was Rhodey’s damn soul mate. Besides, who needed to remember birthdays anyways? Ohh, you’re one year closer to your ultimate demise, congratulations on not being killed off this year! That was much more impressive for the elderly, but in the meantime it was meaningless.

“Can you remove yourself from these dreams?” T’Challa asks.

“No, no, don’t go! I actually like you,” Tony says, looping an arm around T’Challa’s neck like that would help.

“I am not going anywhere, I want _him_ to leave. We were having a good time before he showed up and I am excited about the prospect of dream sex!” T’Challa says excitedly.

“ _T’Challa_ ,” Tony says, playfully swatting him.

“You cannot tell me that is not exactly where your mind went, I know you too well,” he says.

“That is exactly where my mind went but that’s not the point-” Tony starts but Steve cuts him off.

“ _Tony_ ,” Steve says, throwing his arm up in frustration, “does this not matter to you at all?” he asks.

Tony frowns, head tilted to the side, “uh, no? I’ve been trying to kill this bond for like a month and a half and it’s just not going anywhere, this is like a bad breakup- I feel no pain here T’Challa. Dream sex is totally a go and honestly I am so excited because in real life I feel like death is trying crawl into me and use me as a human skin suit,” he says honestly.

T’Challa wrinkles his nose, “you need to dirty talk, that was not at all sexy,” he says and Tony throws his head back and laughs.

“Well, if that’s what you want-”

“ _Tony_ ,” Steve interrupts _again_ , “could you not? I’m _right here_.”

“So?” Tony asks, wondering when the hell Steve decided that Tony has ever had shame. There were a ridiculous amount of TMZ articles with him naked all over them- he’s never been particularly ashamed of anything body or sex related.

“No he is right, his presence is awkward, if you could leave that would be lovely,” T’Challa says in a pleasant tone, ever the diplomat.

Steve looks like someone just slapped him with a wet piece of bread or something he looked so offended. “ _No_ , he was my soul mate first!”

“Yes, but he actually wants me so that is irrelevant. Besides, if we are going by the first soul mate to pop up in Tony’s life I believe Rhodey won that a good fifteen-ish years before you were even defrosted so your point remains irrelevant,” T’Challa points out.

“Have I ever told you how much I want to kiss you?” Tony asks.

“You could cut straight to the demonstration,” T’Challa suggests and Tony snorts, shaking his head but he complies, pressing a kiss to T’Challa’s lips. When he pulls back Steve is gone. Huh, well that cut down on ‘getting Steve out of the dream’ time.

*

Rhodey near doubles over laughing when Tony tells him about the dream, Peter too. “I kind of feel bad for Steve but also that’s the funniest thing I have every heard. Also how soul mates do you have? I thought people were only supposed to have one?” Peter asks.

“Lies told by people pushing marriage agendas way back when,” Rhodey says, “most people will have at least two bonds in their lifetime, and sometimes soul mates get real weird and change. Other myths include bonds always being romantic and always going two ways. Bonds come in all shapes and sizes but to be fair things are kind of simplified in common knowledge circles. You should look up the science of soul mates, you’ll get some really interesting stuff.” Which was true- he and Rhodey had done a ridiculous amount of research way back in MIT when they had no freaking clue why their bond went one way, why Rhodey was still straight, and why there was no romance between them.

Who knew they would find such a rich history of how soul mates have been used as social control bonds in various points in history? But Tony’s favorite soul mate fact was that Cleopatra claimed basically everyone was her soul mate just to screw them over politically. That, and the time Napoleon claimed to be his own soul mate right before crowning himself emperor. Usually Tony found history boring but it turned out that soul mate history had some very weird and also hilariously dramatic events in it. He hoped that one day some rando high school kid will read something about his own ridiculous soul mate adventures given that he had three and one was a history icon, not to mention making history himself numerous times. And T’Challa was _definitely_ going down in history.

“You know what Rhodes, we’re going down in soul mate history because honestly, remember all that stuff we found? That one Pope? _Madonna_? Well picture this: Tony Stark, boy genius finds Soul Mate One and things go swimmingly, nothing to report there because you’re fantastic. Then Soul Mate Two shows up when I’m significantly older but get this: we’re both fucking superheroes and he’s from the damn forties. Soul mate history will love that but wait, there’s more! Soul Mate _Three_ shows up when Soul Mate Two proved to be a self-righteous dick and get this. _He’s a super hero too_! And not just any super hero, he’s a _Wakandan_ superhero. So now I’ve got three soul mates but Soul Mate One remains awesome- shout out to Rhodey for not being nearly as dramatic as Steve or myself, _Captain America_ gets the boot and T’Challa moves in to snap me up because I am excellent and very romantic-soul-mate free,” Tony says, grinning.

“That one Pope?” Peter prompts, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh _man_ , remember all Hamilton drama? Dude needed to keep it in his pants. And _Lincoln_ , lots of speculation there. You’re right man, you’re totally going down in soul mate history and I’m a little bit upset that I’m not one of the dramatic soul mates people will write papers about,” Rhodey says, looking disappointed.

“Oh, but they can write papers about long standing one way platonic bonds! That seems pretty cool!” Peter says excitedly, precious as always.

“Would you read that over the one time Iron Man dumped Captain America for Black Panther?” Rhodey asks.

Peter looks down, “no,” he admits quietly.

“I would,” Tony lies. But it would make for an interesting paper- Tony was curious about how many others had bonds like his and Rhodey’s.

“You lying shithead, you were all over that one time Henry the VIII kept beheading his soul mates and ended up starting his own religion so he could just divorce them like a normal person. You didn’t give a damn about Ringo Starr and whoever the hell his second wife was,” Rhodey says pointedly.

“Barbra Bach,” Peter supplies.

“See, Peter was interested enough to know her name. And you didn’t know her name either and _come on_ Henry the VIII was lopping off his soul mate’s heads, it’s interesting,” Tony says in his own defense.

“If you aren’t the one being beheaded,” Peter says, hand to his throat looking horrified.

“Whatever. I’m still upset that I get boring part of your soul mate history,” Rhodey says, pouting.

“But you also get the longest lasting most fulfilling part,” Tony points out, “and that counts more to me than whether or not you’re a terrible match for me.”

“Awwww!” Peter says, making a small squealing noise that gets him an odd look from Rhodey.

“Is it just me or are Millennials really weird?” Rhodey asks.

“They’re really weird, but they’re sweet. Please don’t tell me you’ve been out superheroing with no eyes again though,” Tony says, raising his eyebrows at Peter.

“I haven’t. But last week I almost made a mistake that would have blown up a bank, but I saved it so it’s all good!” Peter says, smiling enthusiastically. Rhodey looks horrified and Tony makes a note to go over the kid’s fighting style with him, help him hone it a little so he could cut down on stupid mistakes like that. But hey, he saved it!

*

“So I… would like to tell Wakanda that we are apparently soul mates. They might take our relationship better that way,” T’Challa says, looking worried. Tony presses himself into T’Challa’s body, savoring the relief he found there.

“I think close contact with another soul mate staves off the pain of breaking a bond with the previous soul mate,” Tony says, nose buried in T’Challa’s chest.

T’Challa’s arm curls around Tony, adopting a firm grip on Tony’s waist. “Did you hear me?” he asks.

Tony snorts, “of course I did, that was a hint to take me to Wakanda. People will believe the glow when they see it,” Tony says, knowing from experience with Steve.

“Oh. Well you are certainly glowing, that is new,” T’Challa notes.

“Probably due to the fact that my other soul mate has been draining the damn life out of me almost literally. I think maybe distance will help,” Tony says. His eyes were droopy, tired from the general lack of sleep he’s been getting because Steve kept reappearing in his dreams and Tony wasn’t having any of it so he learned to wake himself up. T’Challa appeared in his dreams too, if with less frequency though that was partially due to the time zone difference between America and Wakanda and partially because the bond was new.

“Have you considered how us being enhanced will affect the bond?” T’Challa asks softly.

Tony lets out a long, thin groan, “that’s why this bond is taking so long to break with Steve, I can feel it. God damnit, the damn serum is supposed to amplify everything, I should have known this,” Tony mumbles.

“Than why would you have such a bad relationship with Steve? It would make sense that if the serum amplified the bond you would have a better relationship with him, not a worse relationship,” T’Challa reasons.

“Unless the traits it amplified in Steve are traits that are incompatible with the traits that I display the most. Which is obviously the case, we’re constantly fighting and bickering and at each other’s throats. Seriously, have I told you that I’m pretty sure we have an enemy bond? I’d call Sam and ask about his with Bucky but that would be weird,” Tony says. Partially because Sam thought he was a selfish asshole, which was kind of true in his defense, but mostly because he didn’t know the guy well.

“Perhaps. But how come our bond did not kick in sooner?” T’Challa asks.

“Rhodey said he and Peter knew weeks ago so it did, neither of us noticed. Probably because I was half dead and you’re still grieving for your father’s loss. You can’t really blame us for not noticing under the circumstances, though apparently only you were glowing. My bond with Steve could have been interfering with my part of the bond trying to go through though,” Tony says. It made sense that his bond with Steve would slow things down all around; Tony’s body just wasn’t in the right state to develop a new bond with someone until now. Which meant that, thank god, the damn bond with Steve was finally starting to wane. At least it wasn’t getting stronger like Tony thought. Maybe the new bond with T’Challa had done something with his bond with Steve… the biological aspects of soul bonds were still pretty understudied and poorly understood.

“Probably, yes. But I am done with the distractions and I think your idea to go to Wakanda is wonderful. I miss you when you are gone and it will be nice to have someone there who understands… I know Shuri lost her father too but we are so different. It is difficult to talk to her sometimes,” T’Challa says softly.

“I know how hard it is to open up to someone. It takes a lot of trust but I’m here okay, and I’ll listen. Unless it’s some law or politics related story than sorry, too boring for me,” Tony says, earning a playful jostle from T’Challa. “Just saying, politics are boring. It’s a fact.”

“Oh come on, politics can be fun. There was one point in Wakandan history when three men claimed to be the sons of the king and they were conveniently all born on the same day, making them all equally entitled to the throne. They ended up all battling each other out, all three died, and the youngest took the throne and is now remembered as the worst king in Wakandan history. It was not fun then but in hindsight that is amusing,” T’Challa says, snickering to himself.

“There are rumors that Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson had an enemy soul bond but I’m pretty sure if they were here they’d vehemently deny that,” Tony says. “Oh, and there are lots of gay Lincoln rumors.”

“I have no clue who those people are, but I will assume in context that may be amusing. Now get up, we have some clothes to pack so we can leave as soon as I am done with Ross tomorrow afternoon. I really dislike that man,” T’Challa says, wrinkling his nose. Yeah, Tony didn’t blame him there.


	7. Chapter 7

All things considered he seemed to be doing well, likely because the bond was slowly breaking. Sometimes he had second thoughts but he’s fairly certain that the feelings were more on Steve’s end than his own. He was sure Steve would find some other person, maybe even a soul mate, to live happily ever after with while Tony worked out his relationship with T’Challa and kept things up with Rhodey. Either way his bond with Steve just wasn’t worth keeping no matter how wrong Steve thought he was about that. It was mostly the pain of the bond breaking talking anyways; Tony doubted he cared much for Tony outside of that. That was fine with him even if it made the time between the bond breaking and his new bond with T’Challa forming a pain in his ass. Once this was over Steve would come to his senses and they could all move on.

That didn’t mean Steve would make it easy on him though and Tony didn’t expect to run into him grabbing coffee from that small coffee shop down the block. In hindsight he should have known this was the kind of place Steve might hang out in but he doesn’t realize until he’s walking past Steve and he feels that familiar tug in his gut. He turns, confused as to why T’Challa would be in the coffee shop only to find Steve there staring at him like he hung the moon.

“Oh no, no,” he says and spins around to walk out but Steve catches him before he manages.

The contact Steve makes, even through the fabric of Tony’s jacket, makes his skin warmer and he swears under his breath. “Tony, _please_ hear me out,” Steve says, sounding desperate.

“Steve, hear _me_ out. I’m doing this for both of us, we _both_ need to move on and find people that are better for us than each other. Actually you do, I found someone and I’m happy. You need to move on too,” he says. He wants to shake Steve off but he can’t bring himself to, probably what little of the bond is left holding them together. But he was doing this for the best, _really_ doing this for the best.

“I love you Tony, I do and I know that we fight a lot-”

“Understatement-”

“I get that things aren’t smooth with us and I know that you-” Steve’s voice sticks and Tony gets the feeling that that’s a surprise to Steve too. “I know that you have T’Challa,” he manages to croak out, barely, while blinking rapidly, “but we have something. We always have. _Please_ believe that,” Steve all but pleads. Tony is struck, much like the last time they did this, by the green in Steve’s eyes. He still has no idea what Zemo was talking about because they weren’t by any means flawed. In fact the green added dimension, beauty…

Tony shakes his head a little, snapping out of it. “Look Steve, I don’t disagree that we had something-”

“Then you’ll understand why I want to fight for this,” Steve interrupts.

“No Steve, I don’t. Just because we had something doesn’t mean it was worth keeping and I swear you’d agree if you couldn’t feel the bond breaking.” He wasn’t thinking straight, _Tony_ wasn’t thinking straight either but he still knew what was best.

“Or maybe you’d be thinking right if the bond was fine,” Steve says. “I know we have our differences but we can work them out.”

“Steve,” Tony says, “I don’t _want_ to work them out, that’s the problem. At a certain point you just know that someone isn’t right for you and I know, even more so because I have people who are right for me. I know how it feels to find someone who fits with you; I’ve had Rhodey for years and now T’Challa. I’m sorry but you couldn’t hold a match to either of them, and to be honest I could never hold a match to Bucky and he isn’t even your soul mate. The proof is in the pudding, we _suck_.”

*

T’Challa had known before Tony had even told him and if Tony didn’t feel like he was dying he’d feel worse. It hadn’t occurred to him that T’Challa was enhanced so he could literally smell Steve on Tony but he figured that whatever hurt feelings he had were lost when Tony lost his breakfast in the toilet. Fucking Steve, he had to be suffering at least a little less than Tony given that he had the serum and Tony didn’t.

“Are you alright?” T’Challa asks, rubbing his back like he had been for the last half an hour.

“Are you?” Tony croaks out, coughing a little.

“I am fine, you are the one in clear pain,” T’Challa says.

“I’ll be okay just… I just need time,” Tony says. He didn’t _want_ to give it more time, didn’t want to have this fucking bond anymore but if he kept running into Steve it would continue to try and keep itself there.

“I… I do not want to but I have to go. Would you like me to call Rhodey?” T’Challa asks. Thank god for small mercies, Tony supposed, because there was at least a zero percent chance of Rhodey being off in some other country. But then the reason why that was the case sort of eliminated his gratefulness. Tony nods and T’Challa stays with him until Rhodey shows up. Thankfully by then Tony was well enough to stay on the couch even if he still felt like death.

“Hey,” Rhodey says, wheeling closer to feel Tony’s forehead, “you look like shit and you’re running a pretty high fever. Maybe you should get checked out…”

Tony smiles as best as he could under the circumstances, “I’m fine Rhodey, I just need to relax a little and I’ll be okay.”

Rhodey frowns, “relax a little? I don’t know if you’ve noticed but that’s all you’re currently capable of.” Well, he wasn’t exactly wrong Tony supposed. Rhodey gently runs his hand through Tony’s hair though, ignoring the sweat and sits with Tony in silence for awhile. When Rhodey finally talks he’s almost asleep, “I don’t know how I feel about you going to Wakanda,” he says.

“Hmm?” Tony mumbles, shifting so he’s sitting up a little.

“I… Look, this is hard for me but I need you here. Right now you being around is the only thing that’s keeping my shit together because I know that I can call you if I need it. I can’t do that if you’re across the world,” Rhodey says.

Tony does his best to blink himself back into awareness because that was really out of character for Rhodey. As long as he’s known Rhodey he’s always been the independent one, the one that never needed anyone’s help for anything. The last time Rhodey asked for Tony’s help with anything was when he was nearing the end of his Masters degree and needed someone to look over his homework and even then he looked resentful. “Technically you can still call me across the world,” Tony says.

Rhodey snorts, “don’t be a smart ass. You know what I mean, Tony. No one else understands me like you do and I really need that right now.” He looks serious, more than he usually did on any given day and Tony nods.

“I can always ask T’Challa if I can bring you too. A change of scenery would probably be good for you,” he says. They could both use the change in scenery.” Rhodey was getting dragged through the media mud as much as Tony was and that couldn’t be easy, especially in his situation. Tony knew how hard it was to deal with the media after a life-changing injury.

“That isn’t fair to either of you,” Rhodey says, shaking his head.

“And leaving you behind is fair to you? It’s fine Rhodey, I mean it’s been how long since you’ve been on vacation? But just so you know if birds attack you I’m leaving you behind because I value my life and birds have no souls. Especially geese, which makes no sense because they’re from Canada, aren’t Canadians supposed to be nice?” Geese were like the wasps of birds, horrible, loud, and will attack anything for a scrap of bread. Unfortunately Tony has been that anything on more than one occasion.

“Screw you Stark, those geese should have gotten you when they had the chance,” Rhodey says.

*

Tony knew T’Challa would agree to bring Rhodey along but Rhodey still tries to back out, not wanting to be a burden. He understood Rhodey’s hesitation to ask for help, and his hesitation especially. Tony has never been good as asking for help ever, usually Rhodey sensed he needed it before he ever had to ask, but accepting help was hard. It required trust in a person and trust wasn’t easy for the most level headed of people.

Rhodey certainly wasn’t willing to trust people to take care of him, he more prided himself in the ability to take care of other people and Tony understood that too. He tried to take care of others- and did terribly- but it was easier to extend your arm than to take someone’s hand. But he needed Tony and he wasn’t about to leave him behind just because he was stubborn. Tony was stubborn too and Rhodey was with him every step of the way, always. So he’d be there for Rhodey too because that’s what he needed.

“You are lucky to have someone like Rhodey in your life, and he is lucky to have you. I do not have many friends- they are difficult to find in my position,” T’Challa says. Rhodey sits across from them snoring away and Tony smiles.

“Yeah, I know. It’s hard to find someone who doesn’t want something from you at some point.” Everyone wanted something from him and they were more than willing to take it. It didn’t make him the most trusting of people and he doubted T’Challa was different given his high status and political position. Hell, he probably had enough people who stood against him politically that he had to screen for friends based on possible political sabotage alone.

“I can relate. But it is nice to see, you and Rhodey. You two work rather well together,” T’Challa says.

Tony remains quiet for a long moment, “you aren’t… jealous of that, are you? Because we don’t have the same kind of bond that you and I do. There’s nothing to be jealous of.”

“I am jealous, but not that you and Rhodey share an obvious bond. I am jealous that I do not have a bond like that with someone else. I know that the bond you have with Rhodey is not threat to our bond. If it were you never would have bothered with anyone but him, and given that we are currently together flying back to Wakanda that clearly is not the case,” T’Challa points out.

Tony nods, “good, because you’re right. Our bonds are totally different and unlike most I like to think they can coexist.” Some disagreed but Tony thought they were small minded and sad for restricting themselves like that. He wouldn’t give him his bond with Rhodey for anything and he was happy that T’Challa understood. Not everyone did.

“Of course they can. Unless he likes horses, then we must sever all ties. Soulless creatures,” T’Challa mumbles, shuddering.

“Bad experience?” Tony asks. T’Challa just gives him a look and Tony bursts out laughing, waking Rhodey up and earning himself a second dirty look.


	8. Chapter 8

Wakanda is stunning. Tony hadn’t known what to expect really, T’Challa told him Wakanda was nicer than America but he was sort of biased considering he was the king of the country. He had been told that there were several eco systems in Wakanda as well, which was odd for a country so small, but it meant Tony had no clue what he was walking into. In T’Challa’s area there was mostly rain forests and mists that created a gorgeous green landscape that was relaxing compared to his usual.

He loved the city lights or the ocean from his own homes too, but these days the view reminded him of who he was when most days he just wanted to forget. The pain was minimal though, probably because of the distance between himself and Steve. He had less dreams of Steve too and he could feel his bond with T’Challa growing stronger, same with his bond with Rhodey. That- his feeling his bond with Rhodey- was unusual but Tony figured it was due to the unusual amount of time they were spending together lately. They used to be inseparable in college but Rhodey moved on to the military and Tony went on to do things for SI. After that they didn’t have nearly enough free time to spend almost any length of time together. Mostly it was short visits here and there whenever they happened to be in the same areas.

Tony wondered if that ever took a toll on Rhodey like it had on him. It wasn’t like he had oodles of friends and he missed Rhodey when he wasn’t around. But Rhodey has always been the more independent and less clingy one so maybe he faired better.

“How are you feeling?” T’Challa asks, making Tony jump because he hadn’t heard T’Challa walk up.

“Jesus, we are going to have to put a bell on you or something. I’m fine though, I mostly just feel tired and my joints hurt but that might just be my age so there’s that. I can feel the bond waning though.” More than it had back when he was in New York thankfully. It was easier here when he didn’t have to worry about Steve being around, lurking behind some corner or showing up at his doorstep looking to talk about something that Tony was done discussing. The only thing he had to worry about here was whether or not Peter was safe and whether or not some villain might pop up when super heroes super heroing was still a bit controversial. Spider-Man got a weird amount of flack despite causing the least amount of super hero related damage in history, including that dude running around in Hells Kitchen.

T’Challa smiles and sits down next to Tony on the balcony that overlooked the trees. “Good. I recently had to block Steve’s number because I was foolish enough to give it to him in case of an emergency, but I am happy to hear that you are doing well.” Tony presses himself into T’Challa and smiles when T’Challa wraps his arm around him, content.

*

Rhodey never really _expected_ to find a soul mate in Wakanda of all places and honestly he wasn’t really looking or another one- Tony was a full time _job_ , but he finds Shuri anyways. He had expect to get snubbed by the princess less than he had expected finding her but T’Challa informed him that she was _not_ on board with the whole ‘open Wakanda to the rest of the world’ thing so that was probably why she snubbed him. Rhodey leaves her be, figuring if she wanted something out of him she knew where he was. In the meantime he attempted to distract Tony from doing something stupid like try and pet the damn panthers that relaxed in the back yard. It didn’t work well, but the panthers remained untouched like they should be.

“I thought you were supposed to keep T’Challa’s twit of a soul mate from killing himself,” Shrui says, appearing much the same way her brother did. Silently and out of nowhere.

“Tony marches to his own beat but don’t worry, he’s died a few times, didn’t stick.” He was a surprisingly hard man to kill, especially considering how often he went out of his way to get himself killed. Sometimes he wondered if Tony stayed alive out of sheer spite towards everyone who told him what he was doing was going to get him killed. It sure seemed like it most days.

Shuri looks like she wants to comment on that but she doesn’t. Instead she looks down at him with her arms crossed, clearly trying to figure something out. “Look, if you don’t want this that’s fine, Tony’s a pain in my ass anyways and I don’t really know if I have the time to commit to another person,” he says truthfully. _Someone_ had to make sure Tony wasn’t going off to get himself killed and if Tony wasn’t going to do it Rhodey guessed that’s where he stepped in.

“Why is Tony relevant to you in regards to bonds?” she asks and Rhodey sighs.

‘No one told you about the bond, of course no one told you about the bond. Tony’s my soul mate but strictly in platonic terms and the bond only goes one way. Guess your brother figured that might be less offensive or whatever coming from me,” he says.

“Hmm. Why would you assume that information would be offensive?” she asks.

“One, cut the fucking mind games I don’t have time for that shit. Two, one way platonic bonds in America are taboo and according to T’Challa Wakanda takes soul mates _way_ more seriously than America. Which is beyond weird for me because America never shuts up about the damn bonds and finding your ‘one true love’ and all of that other crap. Seriously, we made a holiday out of some guy stoned to death and beheaded because he was vaguely associated with soul mates.” Rhodey felt bad for Saint Valentine, he’d be pissed if he got stoned and beheaded and that got turned into a pointless holiday.

Shuri wrinkles her nose, “that sounds _barbaric_ ,” she says, horrified.

“To be fair he died in third century Rome so it’s been awhile but still. People give out flowers and chocolates and these ridiculous Hallmark cards on the day some guy got sainted and ignore his brutal murder. And apparently Wakanda takes more seriously than the country that celebrates _that_ holiday so I figured my bond with Tony might be a little weird to you.” It was more than a little weird to everyone in the Army, so much so that they all asked all kinds of questions that were invasive and rude.

“Did it not occur to you that my soul mate sharing a soul mate with my brother is far more bizarre than whatever bond you have with your… _Tony_ ,” she says, lip curling as she said Tony’s name.

“Hey, he’s a good person alright. Just because he isn’t from Wakanda doesn’t mean he’s horrible. That’s a pretty rude opinion,” he says. Tony might have his flaws but Rhodey wouldn’t put ‘American’ on that list of flaws.

“I do not care what you think of my opinions,” she says. He could appreciate her being blunt he guessed, even if he disagreed.

“Then why are you here?” he asks, curious as to why she’d care to show up to talk to him if she didn’t care about his opinions.

“Because Wakanda takes soul mates seriously and I wondered why on _earth_ Bast would pair me with you,” she says. Back to that blunt honesty, Rhodey supposed.

“Find anything to give you an answer?” The question is more of a courtesy than anything, he wasn’t sure he liked Shuri all that much.

For a long moment she says nothing, just looks at him. “Surprisingly yes. People do not like me, I am harsh and unforgiving and people do not know what to do with that. You do not seem to care about that, nor or you intimidated by it. That is a rarity in my life.”

“Twenty five years of dealing with a guy who thinks saying whatever he wants whenever he wants and has extreme trust issues prepares a guy to deal with a prickly personality. You might want to work on not being insufferable though,” he tells her, dishing out his own dose of harsh bluntness before he leaves to go find Tony.

When he does finally find his best friend Tony is covered in dirt and he looks traumatized as T’Challa dusts him off. “The hell happened to you?” he asks as he wheels up.

“I uh… decided to go for a walk in the forest and sort of fell down a really big hill and almost got eaten by a snake five times my size. Damn thing scared me so bad I managed to run back up the hill,” he says, looking very much like he had run into an unusually large snake.

“You know what, I finally found one of those silver linings you told me I should look for the other day. Normally I would be right there with you about to be eaten by a snake that god should have never created by now when you decide to do stupid things like explore forests in foreign countries I can just say ‘nope, I don’t have legs’. How’s _that_ for a silver lining?” he says smugly.

“Can we just skip to the part where we feel bad for me?” Tony asks.

“No because you did this to yourself and you can think about why what you did was a bad idea for a moment so you don’t do it again,” Rhodey tells him.

“I’m not going to stop checking things out because I almost got eaten by some stupid snake,” Tony says.

“Will very large spiders deter you?” T’Challa asks. Rhodey lets out a shriek completely by accident and Tony laughs.

“No, but it might convince Rhodey to care about me again,” he says.

T’Challa frowns at him and he shrugs, “I really don’t like bugs. They freak me out, spiders don’t even _need_ that many legs. Or that many eyes. It isn’t right.”

*

Steve can feel when the bond breaks, can feel it when Tony lets go of the last bit of the bond than held them together and it _hurts_. They way it hurts isn’t really physical though he has physical pain too, but the pain is more emotional. He can feel the bone deep loss of his soul mate and to some other soul mate too. Somehow that makes it all worse because now he knew that Tony didn’t just let go, he actually found someone better.

The serum was supposed to make him perfect in every way and he supposed maybe that was why he didn’t work on his relationship with Tony. Maybe he thought it didn’t need work, or maybe he just assumed Tony would stay. He really did love Tony, more than anything except maybe Bucky. But he’s known Bucky longer, had more of a history with him. He wished that Tony had been able to see how much Steve still cared about him though, how much he had wanted the bond. He thought he fought for it but…

“I’m sorry,” Sam says; hand on his back rubbing slow circles into it. Bucky sits across the room not knowing what to do so he throws a coaster at Sam, who smacks it away easily. They start bickering, shooting insults back and forth at an impressive speed and bonding in their weird way and Steve sighs, feeling what was left of his bond with Tony dangle there, not quite making its connection anymore.


	9. Chapter 9

Tony looks so much more radiant than he had two months ago, T’Challa notes, because he no longer had a soul bond that appeared to be literally sucking the life out of him. His eyes were brighter and his skin was less translucent than it was even before he decided to break the bond with Steve. T’Challa watches him work in the lab happily, content with the way the bond between them as settled over the last six months. Rhodey had been accommodating as well, even when that left him with T’Challa’s sister and she hadn’t been too fond of him in the beginning. Now she was regretting her rather rude introduction because she now had no idea how to connect with Rhodey and she wanted to. Little did she know Rhodey already knew that but he was making her work for it a little, more than used to dealing with difficult soul mates thanks to Tony.

“What?” Tony asks a few minutes later, finally tuning back into what was happening around him.

“You are beautiful, you know that?” T’Challa tells him. He was certainly… _unusual_ by his country’s standards but beautiful nonetheless- it was the eyes. He has always thought brown eyes were beautiful and it had been odd to him when he was studying at Oxford that others did not think the same.

Tony ducks his head, grinning a little, “thanks,” he says quietly, remaining silent for a long moment before he wheels himself over to T’Challa and presses his head into T’Challa’s stomach. “I’ve spent a long time waiting for someone other than Rhodey to connect to. Thought I found that with Pepper, even the Avengers, but I was wrong. I’m lucky to have you,” he murmurs.

T’Challa runs his fingers through Tony’s soft hair. “I have spent the better part of my life hoping that maybe someone would understand that your soul mate is not always the best person for you. And I never would have thought anyone would relate to how I lost my father, the pain that that can cause witnessing that kind of thing. Even Shuri could not understand that. I am lucky to have you too.”

*

“You know you’re good friends with someone when you can ask them to help you go to the bathroom. This was not a level of comfort I ever wanted with you,” Rhodey says, wrinkling his nose but he was at least comfortable with it now. When he first lost the use of his legs it had been hard to accept the way things were now. He worked hard to be independent; to not depend on anyone but himself and it had been hard to relearn a new kind of independence. He managed though, mostly because of Tony. People liked to act like it was a hardship being his friend, his soul mate, but it wasn’t. He was caring, compassionate, and willing to help Rhodey take a shit when needed. You don’t find friends like that every day, or even once a year. There were a lot of things his friends from the military might help him with but the day-to-day mundane things no one would have even considered an issue was not really one of them. So the next time someone told him being bonded to Tony must be a hardship he was going to smack someone.

“Well Rhodes, to be honest when I decided that giving you a shot back in MIT was a good idea even though I was sure you were insane and stalking me I didn’t really see us here in twenty five years either. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world, you’re the best soul mate ever,” Tony tells him, giving him a genuine smile. It was hard to get one of those out of Tony but he was happy that he could. It didn’t matter that the bond was one way, he knew Tony felt the connection anyways, just not the same way Rhodey did.

“I can assure you I had no interest in stalking you. Do you remember how much of an ass you were?” And that didn’t even touch on the terrifying confidence Tony had in everything. Rhodey spent the better part of the first decade of their friendship simply making sure Tony didn’t _die_.

“I was a _delight_ , Rhodes, don’t even lie to yourself,” Tony says.

Rhodey lets out a laugh, “oh yeah you were _real_ delightful. Someone slapped you at least twice a week and you deserved it, _and_ you had a knack for pissing off all of our profs. You couldn’t just let someone feel smart for a moment before making it known that you were smarter.” The only one he hadn’t done that to was a girl in their program Candace, who had a knack for beating Tony at his own game, Pepper, and Rhodey. It didn’t really work out with Candace, but the pattern was pretty obvious after that. It was like Tony ran mini tests to see who wouldn’t be bulldozed by his loud personality and stuck to whomever stood up to him like glue. Rhodey would have thought Steve fell into that pattern but that went sour quick. Luckily T’Challa was more than willing to call Tony on his crap and he actually appreciated him at the same time. A rare combination in the life of Tony Stark.

“That’s because I _am_ smarter, that’s hardly my fault,” Tony says, nose in the air.

Rhodey snorts, “I hope you know that this is why you have no friends,” he says, earning a playful shove from Tony not that it did much with the way his wheelchair was sitting at the moment.

Tony probably would have given him a snappy remark but a knock on the door interrupts them. He didn’t really need to turn to know it was Shuri, he could feel her presence, but he does anyways out of instinct. Tony looks back and forth between them and grins, “I’ll leave you two alone. Go get ‘em tiger,” Tony says to him, punching him lightly on the arm and running off to leave Rhodey to deal with his embarrassing best friend’s remarks.

“He isn’t in his right mind like… ever so don’t listen to him,” Rhodey tells Shuri, at least earning a small laugh out of the prickly princess.

“I am aware of Tony Stark’s… antics but I am not here to talk about him. I… I wanted to apologize for how we first met. You have to understand that Wakanda is not exactly open to outsiders. Being bonded to someone outside my country was jarring, and somewhat offensive,” she says.

He can tell that she’s trying really, _really_ hard to be genuine but like Tony apparently she had no idea how to phrase things. “So your apology is to tell me that you find being bonded to me offensive?” he says, raising an eyebrow at her.

Shuri winces hard and rubs her temples, “oh I give up, I am no good at these things. I do not do emotional things well and… and I do not find my bond to you offensive, I was just confused. There are plenty of lovely men in Wakanda, why the American?” she asks and Rhodey has to laugh.

“Just so you know you’re getting _worse_ here,” he tells her. “But if what you mean to say is that you never really expected to be bonded to someone outside your country and it caught you by surprise, mingled with your assumptions about people outside your country, and you acted like an ass because of that okay. I get it, we all do stupid things sometimes,” he says.

Shuri looks relieved, “oh thank Bast I have an emotionally competent soul mate. Perhaps Stark was a trial run in having to deal with someone even more emotionally inept than him,” she says, offering him a small smile.

“Nah, I’m pretty sure my bond with Tony is just that. But apology accepted,” he says, smiling back at her.

*

Tony doesn’t expect to run into Steve pretty much ever given that they were both under completely different sets of laws in regards to superheroing at the moment but he does end up running into him trying to find some bizarre coffee item on the Starbucks menu that T’Challa liked. “Tony?” someone says and he turns, prepared to find some random fan instead of Steve. Huh. He was used to feeling the bond there, something that told him when Steve was about to approach or that he was there.

“Uh, yeah?” Tony says, unsure as to how he was supposed to approach having a conversation with his ex soul mate.

“How are you?” Steve asks, looking almost eager to know.

He frowns, “fine. Great actually, I’m thinking of moving in with T’Challa because I can do most of my work in Wakanda and we’ll be closer that way. I’d still travel a lot but it’d put less strain on our relationship. Rhodey ended up being Shuri’s soul mate so I could probably bring him with me,” he says, wondering where they would house Rhodey specifically. He guessed he’d have to talk to Rhodey, Shuri, and T’Challa about it and see what they thought. He wasn’t much fond of leaving behind one soul mate for another though and Rhodey came first, Tony would be more likely to stay in America with him than move across the world with T’Challa.

Steve winces a little and he looks significantly less excited, “oh…” he says softly, looking away.

Tony had no damn clue how he was supposed to salvage this so he blurts out the first thing that comes to mind. “Well I’m sure you’re doing better, I mean the bond is broken and all that so you’re free to go do whatever you want. I heard some rumors about Sharon Carter,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows a little in an attempt at humor.

Steve just looks confused though, “Sharon? Peg’s niece? That’s a bit… weird don’t you think? I don’t know where you heard that but listen; the bond didn’t break, not completely. I can still feel it there, reaching out for you, maybe if you just reached back…” Steve says, trailing off a little almost desperately.

For a moment Tony does nothing, unsure of what to say before he licks his lips and speaks. “Look, I’m sorry but I don’t feel anything at all for you Steve. I’m not saying that to be mean or cruel it’s just true so move on, it’ll be good for you,” he says softly, urging Steve to actually follow his advice.

“Tony-” Steve starts, reaching out to him but Tony steps back and shakes his head.

“No Steve, we’re done and I’ve made that clear. Let go of your end of the bond, holding on to the past isn’t going to get you anywhere but hurt. Take it from an expert, I _know_ that refusing to accept that what’s done is done will only hurt you in the end.” With that he leaves, fleeing the scene with no coffee for anyone but it was easier to do that than deal with Steve.

*

Tony sits with his feet in T’Challa’s lap, Peter sprawled out with his homework on the floor, and Shuri trying her best to win Rhodey over with food while some cheesy eighties movie plays in the background. T’Challa, Tony has discovered, hated all things action related at least in the American context, but Tony loved action movies so T’Challa suffered. That was love.

“Can’t you do my homework for me?” Peter whines from his spot on the floor, head buried in a physics textbook.

“No I can’t because you need to learn on your own. Number four is wrong, but you did three right,” he says, trying to throw the kid a bone.

Peter only lets out another prolonged groan, “Rhodey?” he asks, giving Rhodey a really hopeful look. It would have been a whole lot cuter if Peter was five years younger but sadly he was a gangly fifteen year old, not an adorable ten year old.

“Not a chance, kid,” Rhodey tells him, snickering when Peter drops his head back into his textbook.

“Oh fine, I will take pity on you. What are you learning?” Shuri asks, sitting down in front of Peter’s books.

“Are you qualified for this?” Peter asks, earning an offended noise from Shuri.

“Yes I am! I have a physics degree, and an engineering degree! Why does everyone question this?” she mumbles. Peter, for his part, gives her a sheepish apology and pushes his text towards her.

“This is nice, you know,” T’Challa says. “It would be nicer in Wakanda, even if Peter’s visits would be considerably limited.”

Tony snorts, “smooth, honey. I’m considering my options at the moment,” he says.

T’Challa gently squeezes his leg, “I know, but I am just saying the greenery is a much nicer view than the smog,” he says, grinning and Tony sighs heavily.

“I like the smog. I like the greenery too, but this is my home, it’s hard to consider leaving it all behind.” As much bad memories as he had here this was all he knew and he wasn’t sure he could leave all of this.

“You could use a fresh start,” T’Challa notes.

“I know I could. But that’s a pretty big ‘fresh start’ even for me,” Tony says.

“Well I could use a fresh start too and I figure living in Wakanda might be an adventure,” Rhodey says.

T’Challa raises an eyebrow but Shrui shrugs, “what? I do not like America, I might as well bring him back with me,” she says.

“Thank you for asking _the king_ ,” T’Challa says.

“I am not asking my brother for permission to bring my soul mate into the country, you get to brig yours,” she says.

T’Challa sighs, “through a legal process that I _do_ hope you have considered,” he says.

“I have the paperwork,” she says flippantly, “you are doing that question wrong Peter,” she tells the frustrated teen. T’Challa looks annoyed but he says nothing, clearly used to the banter with his sister.

“Well that makes my decision a lot easier. Rhodey was really the only thing keeping me here aside from nostalgia so yeah, I’ll go. Might not pass your vetting process though,” he says honestly.

“The current vetting process- which I am looking into changing- is nearly impossible to get through though both you and Rhodey would technically pass on different merits. Being bonded to Wakandans helps too, legally that gives you better standing but we will worry about all that boring nonsense later. I am excited,” T’Challa says, beaming with happiness.

“Can I come too? I feel like I need to jump countries to escape my damn physics homework,” Peter says, looking at his textbook with dismay and earning a laugh out of the adults in the room. Yeah, Tony didn’t miss the homework even if he only ever had homework like twice. It was still tedious and he didn’t envy those who had to deal with that crap all the time. "I'm  _serious_ ," Peter whines, earning another laugh.

**Author's Note:**

> [My writing Tumblr](https://tenspencerriedplease.tumblr.com/)


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